Business Time - a blog about sex

Tied Down

2012-01-18T05:23:00.000-08:00

It’s solid and sturdy. And wide and long. It’s a new table.

H instructs me to clear it. I can hear him rustling in the bedroom. He returns, and tells me to remove my pants. I do so, sliding them down one leg and then the next, before stepping towards him, leaving them in a bundle on the kitchen floor. I stand close, my crotch inches away from his, and feel warmth, then the tip of his now erect penis touching my mound through the thick fabric of his shorts. He lifts me, and moves me back placing me on the edge of the table.

“Lie down”, H says. I do as he says, my feet dangling off the end. I make myself open to his use – spreading my legs and arms open.

H slowly walks around the table once, then a second time. This time he grabs my right wrist and loops a rope around my wrist, before taking it down and around the sturdy table leg, and then the next corner, before coming back up to loop around my left wrist. I pull, I cannot move my arms.

H moves down to my feet, and pulls me in one strong movement, so that my body moves down the table and my arms are forced to shoot up straight above my head, parallel to each other and the table.

H loops another rope around my left ankle, the table legs and back up to my right ankle, as he had done with my wrists. He gently drags one finger along the length of my tanned left leg, slaps my clit and moves down my right leg.

H circles the table, silently, my pussy dripping with anticipation. I hear a buzzing as he takes a vibrator from his pocket and starts teasing me – gliding it all around my groin, pressing harder and harder as he circles towards my clit.

With one hand steering the vibrator, H uses the other to spread my own moisture. Moving one finger left and right across my hole, my pussy aches for him to enter me. H senses this, smiles and continues to move his free hand around my groin and dripping pussy – massaging as he does so.

I try to press myself onto his finger as it passes my opening, but H moves away and tells me “Stop that. Wait your turn”.

He continues to move the vibrator firmly and steadily around my clit, before he mounts the table, pushing me back so that my legs straighten and my arms can now move apart again.

My head dangling slightly off the edge of the table, H lifts my waste, unzips his shorts and sticks his hard, long cock straight into me, thrusting deep and hard in one movement.

Shocked, I let out a load gasping moan, and then giggle as I realise the kitchen is not as neighbour-sound-proof as the bedroom is.

H holds me there, thrusting deep but gently – short, deep, slow movements as he continues to control the vibrator over my clit.

I feel my entire body getting hot, my vaginal walls expanding – the sign that losing myself is inevitable. I look up at H, my mouth open, eyes wide, as I feel myself contracting in hard, rhythmic pulses around him.

H doesn’t remove the vibrator as he continues to fuck me, steadily moving faster and with longer thrusts.

Eventually, his cock is exiting and re-entering my hot cunt on every hard stroke.

I feel myself continue to pulsate in long, hard, strong contractions before H pulls out one last time and lets his warm cum shoot out onto my torso and squealing, red hot, face.

H pauses briefly, smiles and then drops me.

Stepping off the table he order me “Clean up” and releases my right hand as I lie panting on the hard wooden surface.

New year, new things...

2012-01-09T10:30:00.000-08:00

2012 rolled in with a bang. I'm feeling hopelessly optimistic about trying out new things this year. Starting with pole dancing lessons.

Other things on my sexy-times bucket list (maybe not ALL for 2012 ;-) )

Have a Mfmf
Have a Mmf
Get proactive about fulfilling H’s fantasies
Have a one night stand with a man
Have a one night stand with a woman
Manage to squirt DURING penetration - I wanna see it hit H's belly button while he's "balls deep"
More regular rope and bondage play
Find some new subs for H and I to group play with, 2011's DSS relationship was amazing.
Take that epic sunset beach/waves pee shot we've talked about so much
Treat myself to massages and other physical pampering - all the better for a strong libido
Attend a fetish party
... I'm sure this list will continue to grow

And the moral of the story is....

2011-12-20T05:33:00.000-08:00

From Abstrusegoose

Don't get emotionally invested unless you're prepared to fall...hard

She's Just Not That Into You

2011-12-15T06:57:00.000-08:00

So this is another reddit/r/polyamory inspired post.

A fairly frequent theme there is when a male-female poly couple start to feel like the female is having much more success finding men to date, while the male counterpart battles to find women to date. Some of the reasons commonly proposed for this imbalance:

“Its easier for women to get laid than men” – something that doesn’t really make sense because if she’s getting laid, there’s a he getting laid (note: the comment is usually made in reference to hetero-hookups)
When being honest about being in an open relationship, men are classed as “that guy who wants to cheat on his partner” (or something similar – i.e. that in being honest they get rejected because of stereotypes about greedy adulterous men after one thing only). Women, on the other hand, are supposedly more successful because the men they want to hook-up with are more accepting of the open relationship thing, think she must be great in bed or is “easy”, are glad to find that NSA hook up they’re in the mood for etc.

There might be some truth to these reasons, but I have difficulty with them because they position men (whether the poly partner or the new pursuit) as sex-craving, dishonest, and only after a one-night-stands.

These reasons also position polyamory as only about sex – and not about a host of other things. Sure polyamory can be about NSA encounters, but it is often about wanting to form a genuine, long-lasting romantic relationship. And, of course, a host of other combinations in between, such as a genuine, long-lasting fetish-oriented relationship, as just one example.

I see a lot of men commenting that their self esteem is harmed because their female partner is having more “success” finding other (play)mates. Or asking for advice on how to pre-empt the “you’re a greedy sicko who wants to have his cake and eat it too” response from potential (play)mates – i.e. how to come out as poly without blowing your chances of taking things further.

What happens when self esteem is low? People lower their expectations of what they deserve, how they should treated. They forget that they deserve love, kindness, excitement, energy, commitment, respect, consideration and all those other magic ingredients to good relationships.

EDIT: A few days after writing this post, I saw this post about lowering one's standards. It is a slightly different angle, so read it :-)

As a single guy, many of these men would not accept the type of treatment they become willing to accept as a poly man – its as if they think they are less worthy. Communicating this is difficult, though.

Pop-psych advice ala “she’s just not that into you” is filled with “signs” that might not fit to poly set-ups (e.g. she dates other guys, she flirts with your friends etc). But there are some “signs” that do apply. Here are some:

Disclaimer: Obviously, if boundaries have been discussed some of these may have been negotiated and understood to be okay due to the realities of each person involved and the context of each relationship

Second disclaimer: I’m using “he” for the polyamorous pursuer and “she” for the person-of-interest here. Of course, the same principles can apply to every other combination of gender identities.

1. “I’m not looking for a relationship”

So that’s fine. Some people want NSA fun. If they’re honest about it, that’s the most important part, right? You are then empowered to decide whether to:

a. continue with a casual NSA set-up,

b. become friends with benefits

c. just be friends

d. move on

But, and remember this post about being a temporary escape, how do we know when a person just doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you and is using this line to avoid having to actually say that?

Perhaps concurrence with some of the other signs is the only way to know for sure.

(I mean, you have to at least try before you give up)

2. You're always the one initiating contact and you’ve learnt to expect disappointment

If you’re initiating all contact, I don’t think it’s fair to use this alone to assume the person doesn’t think about you, isn’t invested in you, or is deliberately avoiding you. People are busy, sure. If we communicate about this and let people know when are appropriate times to chat or see each other, that’s fair.

If she’s really into you, she’ll make sure that she gets to spend time talking to or being with you – she’ll let you know when she is not busy.

Some things she might do that are signs she’s not into you:

Saying she’s too busy, but then being quick to tell you about all the other friends she’s been seeing,
Posting social media statuses asking the world what they’re up to and who she can join for a party this weekend, without making any effort to ask you if you're free
Making vague maybe-plans with you, and then cancelling when something better comes up without suggesting you change plans/join her

These are a sure way to make you think of yourself as a second-tier friend whom she calls only when she has nothing better to do, or needs a favour.

Remember, just because you’re poly doesn’t mean you deserve to be a lower priority.

If you feel perpetually disappointed by her, don’t expect her to return calls/messages, but have rather come to expect her to deny or cancel plans, its time to move on – she’s either unreliable or just not that into you.

3. Body language, physical contact and flirting

People who are into other people flirt with them through body language. They make eye contact. They laugh at each others jokes, or at least pretend to. They lean in towards you. They touch you.

If she agrees to see you, but then spends the whole time avoiding contact, she might be protecting personal space. In the case of polyamory, she might be worried about social reactions. These are things that need to be discussed. She might also just not be that into you.

4. After all this effort, you haven’t really gotten to know her.

You’re open and share intimacies, desires, hopes and what you’re looking for, stories about your past and current life. She responds vaguely, seems a bit uptight, is secretive.

She might have a hard time trusting people in general, or talking about herself in general. But if she’s not engaging in getting to know you better, doesn’t seem interested in your stories, and doesn’t seem to trust you to share in return, she might just not be that into you.

5. She plays games

She talks big, but seldom fulfils. This can be about promised sexual exploits, or about other things – see point 2. She tries to change you to fit her image. She makes you feel like you’re a player amongst many and she holds all the cards.

She’s either a self-involved narcissist, or she’s playing you – keeping you there as an option, in other words, not that into you.

There are, of course, other reasons for the above behaviours - maybe she's new to poly and not sure how much attention to give you, is scared of stepping on your other partners' toes and so on. Those are things that need to be discussed in any poly setup, however. If you've discussed these issues and she can still be described in terms of the above patterns, she's either not suited for polyamory or just not that into you...

Never mind, there're always more people to meet, and who know's who will be into YOU.

Note: these discussions on reddit tend to overlap with discussions about suitable ways to meet people and how to "come out" as poly. There's been an interesting thread recently about a man who's partner limited his methods to real-life (i.e. he cannot use the internet to meet people who are comfortable with poly). This possibly warrants a post all on its own - something about when an existing partner makes it impossible for you to meet someone who's into you, with potentially similar effects on your self-esteem.

Bound to Come

2011-12-12T02:08:00.000-08:00

I arrived home with bags full of groceries and mundane household supplies. H followed me around as I unpacked, not saying anything. I could sense he was waiting for me to finish. When I was done, he said “Good. Now go to the bedroom, get out your restraints, place ropes near the bed, get all your toys out, undress, put a blind fold on and wait for me on the bed. I’ll be in there just now”.

I followed his instructions, in that order. Lying on the bed I could feel a cool breeze going over my skin, and I could hear H typing in the room next door. I hear music come one. I feel my skin getting colder.

Eventually, I hear H enter the room. I hear him turning the pages of a book. I hear him pulling lengths of rope through his hands and letting it drop on the floor.

H lifts my ankles and starts wrapping rope around them, the end of soft rope falling onto and slithering along my calf with each loop.

My ankles are crossed and bound with what feels like 15cm of tightly spaced rope. H instructs me to turn around.

Lying on my stomach, H yanks my hands behind my back and holds them together with one hand, while looping a rope around with the other. There is a loop around each shoulder. He is knotting the rope along my spine, looping around my arms, anchoring them to my back. With each loop, the end of the ripe is dropping between my thighs, sliding gently over the centre of my bottom. With each slow loop and dragging of the rope over my exposed skin, I grew more aroused.

As he finished, H slapped my left bum check and immediately stuck a finger a few inches into my moist vagina. With my legs bound together and still lying on my stomach, I felt tight but still pushed back - using my hips - to feel him deeper.

He pulled out quickly and said “Turn around”.

I battled to roll myself over without much movement in any of my limbs. Once on my back, H lifted my legs up and licked my clit. With my legs over his right shoulder, I felt his tongue tapping my clit and gliding around it, making it swell with warmth. The position of my arms behind me forced me to arc my lower back and press into his face, while he inserted one, then two fingers into me and fucked me while his tongue continued to rap over my clit.

I could feel moisture spreading, covering everything between my legs, sliding down to my ass. H traced this flow with a finger, circled my asshole and pushed gently – still pounding my wet vagina and energetically sucking and tapping my clit his finger slid smoothly into my relaxed ass. Immediately, I buckled – my bound legs kicking up, I pulsated around his fingers.

Dropping my legs, I felt H’s body moving up over mine. As he lifted the blindfold from my eyes, H placed a finger in my mouth, pressing on my lower lip to push open my mouth and stuck his hard penis deep into my mouth. My lips wrapped tightly around his cock as my tongue went crazy, wanting to trace every part of his manlihood. Desperate to take him deeper my body wriggled, my arms still tightly behind me, he pulled my head back by my hair and shot warm come into my wide open mouth and onto my chin and neck.

Undoing just the bottom knot at my wrists before getting up and leaving the room, H left me there to unravel myself.

Poetry of Lust

2011-11-23T05:44:00.000-08:00

I wrote these a while ago, and some how never posted them.

speaking in movements

The language is friction,

and the meaning is clear.

We're speaking in movements

until the doubt disappears.

Oh, mercy me.

This bed is a canvas.

We are spreading the paint.

Our bodies are brushes,

Oh, the portraits we make.

Oh, mercy me.

The failed attempts of trembling lips

to tell you what I think this is:

a love that somehow still exists

that is screaming from your fingertips

has got me quite confused

and scared as shit.

The language is silence

the meaning is vague.

You're biting my neck

and scratching my legs.

Oh, mercy me.

This bed is an old book.

Tonight is a page

We are revising,

yet the words stay the same.

Oh, mercy me.

The failed attempts of trembling lips

to tell you what I think this is:

a love that somehow still exists

that is screaming from your fingertips

has got me quite confused

and scared as shit.

it's like learning a new language -

two women, together.

it can help to have a man to translate

desire, lust;

kisses passed through a masculine mouth

can cross larger distances

than our two sets of lips.

but when women kiss - tongues form

shapes they've never formed before.

expressions are foreign and still sloppy,

though the potential for elegance

is visible in the novelty.

a new dialect emerges,

women learn more quickly than men.

they touch in prose,

are more comfortable outside their vernacular,

they imitate well,

and generally have a larger vocabulary.

i have travelled the world

and have never heard a tongue as virgin

as the first noise one woman makes

at the mouth of another.

A quick interlude: lets talk consent

2011-11-23T01:32:00.000-08:00

Actually, rather than talk about consent, just read this comic - it pretty much sums up what I wanted to say. H and I use the talking and checklist and menu options. Sounds a bit "formal" but it can actually make for pretty exciting forplay.

And once you've got that down, you can continue to enjoy...

City Hall

2011-10-31T05:35:00.000-07:00

It’s a venue usually held for glamorous classy affairs like Opera and Orchestras and Choirs.

Somehow this year City Hall was transformed into a Haunted Hall with two dance floors that attracted the sexiest of Halloween’s monsters. It took a few drinks before the surreal feeling passed, and to actually be able to hold a conversation that was more than “holy crap tits and ass!” (… but seriously. Tits. And Ass. Everywhere…)

Everyone seemed to be enjoying the freedom that being dressed in character brings. Agent Smith was the Dominant Man that all the Slutty Nurses wooed too. The Cookie Monster accepted strokes and nibbles from hissy cats and Alice in Wonderland. The squirrel (who eventually took the top half off, revealing arms and a torso straight out of Mens Health) grabbed the (ok I’m not sure what she was)’s small, tight ass and slipped his hand cheekily around to caress her crotch, resulting in her turning and kissing him as their hips thrust toward one another.

D and I had been dancing together for a while, subtly flirting when I excused myself to go to the ladies room. She decided to follow, and we held hands as we made our way through the dimly lit double volume City Hall hallways and into a two-cubicled marble bathroom. We closed, but left unlocked, the main door behind us and used the bathroom with the cubicle doors open, chatting shyly about the gorgeous people and their sexy outfits. D finished up and stood at the entrance to my cubicle while my last trickles hit the ceramic toilet.

As I stood up she stepped toward me, and said softly “I want to kiss you”. We lent into one another and kissed – her warm lips were soft against mine, her tongue gentle and sweet… like caramel vodka.

We pulled apart, but in frenzy, were kissing again before we’d taken two steps. Walking forward, I pushed her gently backward as she held my face on either side and pulled me into her. I gently lifted her so she was sitting on the large wooden sill framing the huge double volume window that reflected the light of the bathroom, and everything in it, so clearly I could see the small goosebumps on the skin of her upper back.

As we kissed I could feel her hands rocking my hips, and tentatively rolling the top of my pants down. I undid the buttons of her top and pressed her against the cool glass, caressing her soft warm breast as she slid a hand under my pants and rubbed my moist panties, as cheers and laughter echoed from the party surrounding us.

I heard the door unclick, but did not stop. I felt the strength of a man’s body pressing against me from behind and recognised the scent. H tugged fast on my pants, dropping them to my knees, and knelt as he lifted each foot out. Trailing his fingers back up my legs, he kissed the back of my neck as D and I continued to kiss.

He moved between us and, as he lay D on her back on the large wooden sill, I moved her pants down. As she was lowering her hips onto the sill, H buried his face in her pussy. I knelt down under the sill and unbuttoned H’s pants, gently sliding out his hard penis and taking him fully into my mouth. Sliding my tongue around his sweet tasting dick I used moisture from my throbbing pussy to rub my own clit as I listened to D squirming with enjoyment above me.
H stuck a thumb under each arm pit and lifted me up, manoeuvring me to the side of the sill and pulling D toward me. I licked gently as I teased her opening with two fingers before slowly entering her. She pushed down onto my hand as I did so, encouraging me to press harder and faster, while H pressed his cock into my wet vagina from behind me.

As he thrust forward, so too did I, until I could feel D’s pussy clenching and throbbing around my fingers as her body propelled upwards in agonising pleasure, the sight of which made H lose control and release a warm gift onto the small of my back.

Quietly, with reddened cheeks, we pulled our clothes back on and stepped outside. As we stepped onto the intricately decorated and busy smokers balcony, we looked up to see straight into the large bathroom through a slightly smudged window, realising that the cheers and laughter had been closer than we’d thought.

Press Esc

2011-10-31T05:27:00.000-07:00

We all love to press escape every now and then. Let’s just try not to do so at the expense of others.

Polyamorous couples are often incorrectly seen as swingers – that is, just looking for threesomes and NSA adult fun. This is problematic for those looking for more meaningful connections.

And maybe even more so for those who are open to the NSA fun but also looking for meaningful partnerships.

Let's just take things slow and see where they go is all well and fine.

Except when "where they could go" means different things to different people.

What does one do when one realises that the desire for a more loving relationship is one-sided – that the NSA fun was never a potential-beginning, but the entirety of it all, from the get-go? Over our few years as a polyamorous couple, I’ve learnt a few things about myself in this regard.

When there’s never going to be anything more than platonic fuck-buddy fun from my side, I make that very clear. Verbally it is shared. Behaviourally it is endorsed – there’s sex and then there’s platonic friendship, with a fairly clear line. There’s no cuddling or holding hands or kissing outside of the sexytimes. There’s no escalation in the amount of contact we keep. There aren't any public displays of affection (or at least any more so than common to that friendship). There are hookups in the midst of everything else staying normal. This is very fun and I am glad to have been able to experience this, and even to have it end and a friendship remain in tact thereafter.

B U T

When I am interested in something more than NSA fun, I don’t have a fucking clue how to go forward. There are lots of options between fuck-buddy and life-partners and I like feeling free to explore them all. Still, its not easy.

I fail at communicating properly (hello, polyamory 101 here!).

I’ve been trying to figure out why, so what follows is a somewhat rambling attempt at organising my thoughts about all this.

I’m acutely aware that H and I have a solid history and foundation.

Even though I reject hierarchy in all areas of my life (veganarchist checking in ;-P) and thus reject relationship terms such as “primary”, “secondary” etc, I realise that the person entering into a relationship with H, myself, and/or the two of us, is in a uniquely vulnerable position.

It must be daunting and it must be natural to feel like the “secondary”, like the “last one hired, first one fired”. This is even more entrenched by regular postings on polyamory sites by couples saying they are ending their relationships with their secondaries because the primary relationship needs work, and so on. I dislike this approach.

I’ve always approached any hard times in my relationship with H with the fundamental assumption being that we both emerge on the other side in tact, happy, well, advanced etc and that our relationship emerges in tact. The assumption is that we will get through it. The assumption is that splitting up is not an option.

I’d like to have that with other people – to extend that.

So what does this mean when put together?

The assumption is that H and I will be together in a happy functional relationship.
The assumption is that we do whatever hard work is required in order to achieve that.
When a third or fourth or nth person is added, those assumptions don’t change. Another assumption is added, however. That the nth person is not sacrificed. That the relationship(s) with the nth person are also protected and remain in tact. That “whatever hard work is required” extends to protecting all sets of relationships.

It makes sense to me. Protect all good things in ones life, equally.

Of course, one doesn’t develop that assumption immediately ("hey, nice to mee you, I'll never leave your side!" is a bit freaky, even for me), but gradually over time, together.

But how does a person clarify whether or not that is a possible outcome, from the beginning? Is it even necessary to do so? (I mean, labels, definitions... bleh! Love otuside the box, infinte relationship formats and all that, right?)

H and I usually tell people that we are polyamorous, not swingers.

That we are looking for more long-lasting relationships.

That we actually really love waking up three people in a bed and arguing over whose turn it is to make the coffee.

That rainy days are best spent in a huge cuddle puddle under blankets.

But more than that? It’s a bit forward to be talking serious-y relationship stuff early on (Sometimes its practical to do so - are they comfrotable being "out" or "openly poly"?). And as I said, we’re acutely aware of how vulnerable a nth person might feel entering into relationship(s) with one or both of us, given we are a very stable married couple.

So what typically ends up happening is we let the nth set the pace – let them see what they are comfortable with, how fast and how furious.

This is not entirely fair on anyone involved, though.

We don’t get to express our true desires as openly as we’d sometimes like to, and nth doesn’t get to hear them and be either reassured or freaked-the-fuck-out, whichever the case may be.

Add to that, our experiences with people beyond-NSA have bruised us a bit. Whether we’ve opened up or played it cool, the outcome has been the same in all cases – we’ve been left when the nth finds a monogamous relationship to settle into (or a series of monogamish relationships to continue on with). While we try to remember these as “periods of time when someone wonderful came into our lives”, it’s not that easy.

Don't get me wrong, I've always been happy for the other person - they find good relationships and seem happy.

C O M P E R S I O N.

It's real.

But none of these relationships ended because they weren't working. We were having fun, happy and then nth meets someone who wants to be monogamous. Being tossed aside because the person is over their little experimenting-with-a-couple-phase* is just a sucky reminder that maybe where you thought things could go was never even an option for the other person (*not fair - I realise they were getting more and prioritised that).

To feel that you were nothing more than a temporary escape button.

The suckiness is just as a real as the compersion.

These experiences are making me a worse person, though.

Anyone who knows me will say I am loving - I love too much, too easily, too fully, too unconditionally, as if there can really be such a thing as too much love.

Of course not!

What there can be, is too much hurt.

I've been pretty hurt in the past and now find myself quite paranoid that every-relationship-will-end-in-the-same-way, so even where a part of me is totally smitten, I'm not really allowing myself to fully experience, enjoy and share those feelings. Which is terrible. It is terrible because experiencing and sharing and indulging those feelings, even if temporary, really is wonderful.

I've built a wall guys! - for the first time in my life!

And all the time I hear the poly mantra – “Communicate! Communicate! Communicate!”. And, I guess, this is where my problem lies. I don’t know how much is ok to say how soon into a new relationship.

It’s a fine balance between being so mum you get friendzoned in your sleep, and talking so openly you get stalker-listed for taking things too seriously too fast.

H and I are weird. We know that. We’re a bit shy, but it’s also typically very easy for us to give freely of ourselves. Once we like someone – and I’m talking whether as a friend, or as more – we’re generous with ourselves, our minds, our “stuff” (pfffft), our time… our love.

The problem with that is that people translate that into expectations. People just aren’t used to unconditional gifts these days. Or confuse hope and fantasy with expectations (cos, afterall, we DO hope hope for lazy mornings play-fighting over whose turn it is to make the coffee).

Ahh, expectations. I wrote a paper about expectations in relationships when I was studying couples therapy. It all seemed so simple back then:

Communicate your expectations.
You don’t expect people to just know your expectations.
Make sure that if you cannot meet a partner’s expectations, you let them know and negotiate the way forward.
Be sure that if you agree to meet an expectation, it is assumed that you will and you do and if you can’t you communicate about it asap.

Hahahahahaha! So incredibly simple.

Good god, no one ever taught me The Dating Game.

I’ve always been happy with that – its full of pretentiousness, gender stereotypes, c(l)ue-reading, and guessing rounds that commonly end with >>>Ding!Ding!Ding<<< S/He’s Just Not that Into You!*

*Or is that because the way I read cues is inherently biased towards feeling rejected? I’ve never needed to read cues from H, and everyone I’ve ever needed to read has ended up rejecting me.

I sense a vicious cycle of mumness, cue reading, over analysing, wall building, and then, obviously rejection cos who’d want to be with a neurotic-stalker-chic?

And all the time the amount of love I have to share just keeps growing and growing I might soon start sprouting jasmine, roses and forget-me-nots.

Thoughts on Gender

2011-08-23T06:18:00.000-07:00

I've never described myself as a feminist - I've always felt that whatever socially constructed rules created for women are, by definition, saying something about men and that all of these rules, stereotypes and so on about what women should want, be, feel, think etc are as limiting and oppressive when translated into what men should want, be, feel, think etc. The man who would be happier being a house-husband is as oppressed as the house-wife who'd be happier managing a team of professionals. The man who wants to cuddle and talk after sex is as oppressed by these stereotypes as the woman who wants to fuck, say goodbye and not be called a slut (in the pejorative sense).

When it comes the complex dynamic between gender and sexuality, and identity, I've only woken up relatively recently in life. I was young, had girl parts, had a relationship that worked emotionally, physically, intellectually with a person with boy parts. I thought, "I must be straight and monogamous and cisgendered female".

Only later did I realise I am pansexual. And then polyamorous. As one gets practice rejecting norms and assumptions we've grown up with, so it becomes more natural to question others. I've never really given my gender identity much thought. I've never really asked "Do I feel like a woman?" (What does that even mean?). I'm not convinced that gender cannot be fluid.

I'm sure I am not a "man in a woman's body", but I guess I am a little indifferent to my own gender. It fascinates me, though, and mostly because of the connection with gender and sexuality. Homosexuality is, by definition, built around the biological sexes of the participants in a sexual relationship - the definition is good at ignoring the nuances of gender and the romantic elements of same-sex relationships. Gender identity is but one of multiple variables in any given individual's given sexuality.

Why, then, is the gender identity of participants so important to modern discourse about sex and sexuality. Why not D/s differentiations? Why not kink/vanilla differentiations?

Who we like to fuck, how we like to fuck, varies on many levels. Gender is a line there, an issue, because gender is an issue in society. Because roles and relationships across society have been created along gender lines. And its scary when these are challenged. Apparently, quite especially so when challenged from within the privacy of our own bedrooms.

I was quite pleased to stumble on this term:

P O M O S E X U A L I T Y
According to wikipedia:

"Pomosexuality is formed by adding the prefix pomo- (shorthand for postmodern) to the adjective -sexual, and is used in reference to oneself as a protest against such labels.

Sex-positive activist writers and editors Carol Queen and Lawrence Schimel popularized the term by using it as the title of an anthology of essays published in 1997. In it, they describe pomosexuality as the "erotic reality beyond the boundaries of gender, separatism, and essentialist notions of sexual orientation.""

EDIT: A few days after writing this, I discovered a remarkably similar post worth reading

Visit out tumblr page

2011-07-15T05:02:00.000-07:00

We have created a page just for special images

Enjoy ;-)

Gosh and time has run away again

2011-06-09T07:28:00.000-07:00

Been super busy... fantasising! I have lots of ideas to share here, just need the space and time to write them all down.

Here are some pics to set the mood so long... I'll write a story for each one.

I'm in love with the concept of free forming relationships

2011-04-14T01:53:00.000-07:00

I love that polyamory has brought me closer to living the idea that relationships have an infinite number of potential forms.

http://zinelibrary.info/files/infiniterelationships.pdf

Don't stifle something because it doesn't fit into the 100% platonic vs 100% romantic/sexual relationship moulds that society has created.

A little rant about being pansexual in the real world

2011-04-11T08:18:00.000-07:00

I am quite well aware of the numerous misconceptions out there about bisexual* people – that we’re all promiscuous, indecisive, flaky, cheating people, until we decide to be either straight or gay.

*Note: I identify as pansexual. But let’s just try get over the bisexual hump before we try introduce this “crazy” concept to people. I actually prefer the term "queer" all together as being bi/pansexual is not just about sex, but about relationships, too. Further, I am a woman and write from that perspective, though I imagine a lot of her’s / he’s could be substituted.

Given that H and I have been together for so long, though, most people just assume I am straight and get on with life. As such, I have been protected from homophobia and bi-hate from gay and straight people, alike.

Recently, in a lesbian club, a male person I was talking to told me that I am straight because I am married to a man. To him, it was that simple.

My entire sexuality reduced to my current relationship.

Imagine that – well you’re with a blonde now, so that must mean you exclusively like blondes, right?

I explained to this guy that that was not the case, but was not too concerned what this stranger thought. Then, a few days later, a gay friend of mine repeated the exact same thing to me. Now this is someone I know, someone who knows I am polyamorous, someone who knows I am looking for a woman to love, someone I’ve made out with… someone who understands homophobia… someone who identifies as lesbian but has been known to make out with guys when the mood strikes…. Yet still, to her, the ring on my finger bares testament to my heterosexuality.

So here are some myths about bisexuals/pansexuals and my opinion on them:

1) We’re all promiscuous

Some straight people are promiscuous, some are not. Some gay people are promiscuous, some are not. The same applied for pansexual people. We love people. We are attracted to people. Not ALL people, ALL of the time.

That said, I don’t necessarily believe that promiscuity is in and of itself a bad thing – if sex is enjoyed safely (emotionally, physically), with consent, for pleasure, who cares how often its done or with how many different people? I think that the line of where something is positive and where it is destructive will vary from person to person, based on their character and surroundings, and that this will be quite independent of what sexual identity they carry.

2) We are just seeking attention

This is where straight/gay porn stars shooting both types of sex have given us a bad name. They don’t look into it because they’re not into it. But then again, didn’t your mother ever teach you that porn =! reality?

Ok so there are some girls out there who pretend to be bi and get drunk and make out to impress the boys. All that that proves is that some high school / college age (or maturity-equivalent) people like to be the centre of attention, and believe that appearing to be sexually open is one way of achieving that. That’s a pretty sad issue all on its own, but has nothing to do with real bisexual/pansexual people.

Especially when we consider that not all of us are promiscuous, we are left with a whole population of bisexual people happily and quietly going about their own private lives. The problem is that we assume that people are gay/straight based on their current relationship status – as such, these modest bisexuals are mis-categorised out of the “bisexuals = xyz“ equation.

We're literally being discriminated out of the sample that is used to judge our character.

3) We’re actually deeply closeted gay people

Tell that to my husband who’s seen me with women… and knows just how much I love to suck his cock.

There’s really no easy way to disprove this one, other than to simply say that its not true. All the bisexuals out there are testament to this. If you cannot imagine being attracted to the same-sex, it is not acceptable to deny the existence of people who are. If you cannot imagine being attracted to the opposite-sex, it would be laughed upon if you attempted to deny the existence of people who are. Now, if you cannot imagine being attracted to people for reasons independent of their gender identity…. Well, we’re still going to exist!

4) We’re all looking for threesomes

Again, I am polyamorous and yes I do enjoy group sex. Do I approach every profile on OkCupid listed as bisexual and propose a ménage à trois? Of course not. First of all, I have more tact than that. Secondly, I am well aware that there are bisexual people out there who might have fairly vanilla sexual preferences, and who also identify as monogamous.

I find it quite patronising to hear lesbians say they won’t even talk to someone listed as bisexual because they think that this will be the outcome. This is where I think being upfront can be far better in the long run – if you are concerned that this may be the outcome, ask upfront “I’ve heard of some bad experiences, I just want to be sure – are you trying to recruit someone for a threesome?”. If they are, you can tell them its not for you. If they’re not, well looki-here, you just made a new friend that you were about to ignore based on… wait, what’s that? Based on her sexuality…. Isn’t that called discrimination? In fact it is, and it even has a name: biphobia

5) We need drama in our lives

Similar to, though not the same as number 2, this relates to the idea that we are, in fact, straight, or at the very least capable of living a straight life, but want the drama, admin, attention etc that comes with being homosexual.

This one doesn’t make any sense to me.

Firstly it re-enforces negative stereotypes about gay relationships being unstable.

Secondly, it makes it seem like systematic discrimination is something that bisexual people actually crave. Right, I'm not really attracted to women, I just have sex with them because I want to be discriminated against, too! I think that implies a mental illness, not a sexual orientation.

Thirdly, it totally ignores all of the benefits that relationships provide – relationships in general, as well as those joys that are unique to a straight or gay relationship. Like the sex, for one thing, Like sharing clothes. Like approaching problems in similar ways. Like the benefits for birth control or procreation. Oh wait a second, actually all of these things are dependent on the individual people involved. The fact is, a fulfilling relationship can be had, why would we deny ourselves the chance of experiencing that, of living that, just because society thinks its easier if we choose to be attracted to someone of the opposite sex, only, and always.

6) Bisexual people are more likely to cheat

Unless every long term relationship that ever ended in infidelity involved the cheating partner being bi, I think it is quite clear that fidelity is probably not directly linked to sexual orientation, or even relationship orientation, for that matter.

I really enjoy sex, and it is an important part of my relationship. If my fantasies are incorporating someone other than my husband, or multiple people other than my husband, this doesn’t make me want to cheat on him. It is fodder for a more adventurous, creative sexual encounter, with my husband.

If I’m tempted to go outside of the relationship to find something that should be met within the relationship, there’s a problem in our relationship. We need to communicate about that problem. It might be sexual, it might not. If we fail to communicate about it, that’s a communication failure, not bisexuality rearing its cheating head.

I'm not really sure who we are supposed to be cheating with... Woody Allen is quoted as saying: "Being bisexual doubles your chance of a date on Saturday night”. Given the stereotypes around bisexuals, I doubt this is true…

6) We're all really just very confused bipolar people who cannot make a decision

Apart from the misunderstanding of bipolar disorder, this also implies that there is a decision to be made. That we’re just really confused and are actually incapable of telling the difference between “am attracted to” and “am not attracted to”.

Straight people are not attracted to every person of the opposite sex, and gay people are not attracted to every person of the same sex. So, how do you know when you are attracted to someone? I’m pretty sure it feels the same for me. The only difference is that I can experience that reaction to people regardless of their gender identity.

7) There is no such thing as a male bisexual

So many of these steroetypes are implicitly about women. We also encounter more bisexual women in the media and in real life.

Where are all the bisexual men? Being hidden neatly under the neat labels of "straight", "gay", and "depraved".

If you’ve read this and are still confused, here’s some simple advice. If someone tells you they are bi/pans, DO NOT respond with:

• In other words, you’re gay?

• Yeah sure, when your husband wants two ladies loving his lolly.

• So which one do you prefer, honestly?

• Wanna shag? (ok this might work with /some/… depending on how attractive you are to them, and on their personal approach to sexual encounters)

• So when can we hook up behind your husband’s back?

Just a little cross post

2011-04-07T08:09:00.000-07:00

Monogamous Privilege Checklist, by Cory Davis

Read it for a bit of solidarity.

How do I love thee. Let me count the ways

2011-03-23T05:18:00.000-07:00

I like the idea of unconditional love. I think often its something we strive for more than we actually possess/live it. And by that I do not mean loving someone despite/for their flaws, but loving them even when they do not return love in the way it is desired, like I wrote about here.

I'm an extremely rational person. But I became that way in order to deal with my sensitivity - I am rediculously empathetic, cry for soppy adverts, get the shakes in scary films, and overall tend to just feel very strongly toward people. There are different kinds of love though. The way I love my friends is quite different to romantic love, which is, for me, characterised by:

when there are things in that person that normally irritate you a lot on other people, but somehow you have near complete patience for it in the loved one.
when you cannot clearly remember life before them, or imagine a future life without knowing them without crying (inside or out)
when thinking about the loved one finding success/happiness in ways that do not benefit you/involve you in anyway, and you're still totally elated for them
when all other emotions are intensified: when I feel sad about them/for them its intense sadness, when i feel happy about them/for them its intense happiness...
when I consider them and my relationship with them in all my day-to-day decisions....
when I want to share minute details of my day with them... and miss them in my core when i cannot...

And yes, this is physical thing - that deep burning in ones heart, that feeling of being filled with tons of efferscent bubbles, the ability to actually cry when contemplating that person and what they mean to me - tears of neither joy nor pain, just tears of....love, I guess.

There are lots of ways in which H loves me, and ways in which he doesn’t. You kinda get used to that after so long though – that he just doesn’t express love in some ways and that’s not going to change. Rather, he loves me in his own unique way and I’ve learnt to recognise and appreciate those things.

Love is a chemical addiction. I’m kinda hooked on it. So when someone loves me, and I love them, I’m not going to quit that just because the love isn’t returned or expressed in the way my mind initially tells me to expect it.

quitting is for losers, anyway

And no, I'm not talking about becoming a crazy stalker person, either.

What I am learning recently is that there is great satisfaction and joy in the simple state of loving yourself and loving others. There’s nothing in there about being loved back.

It’s pretty huge that you can love someone with all your heart and soul and yet you never have to be together.

Maybe, just maybe, its even more important that you are making a promise to yourself - that love is a good thing, that you are worthy of experiencing it in all its forms, of giving it freely... that you promise yourself not to kill any love and invite pain into your life, not to torture yourself, or your loved one.

But to simply love.

how to meet people and what this means for discretion/"being out as poly"

2011-03-19T06:46:00.000-07:00

Flirting is fun. Until I mention “my husband” and it stops.

How do we, as polyamorous people, meet people to date?

I’m certainly no expert, but here’s how we’ve gone about it, and also what this has meant for how “out” we are as a poly couple.

H and I are in our mid twenties and can and do go to clubs and big parties. We’ll often meet people and have fun flirting, but as soon as we mention each other, the flirting stops. Scrambling to explain polyamory in that moment is… well its most likely just going to end you educating someone a bit about polyamory.

While that’s good for positivism for various relationship forms, it is not really why you were flirting in the first place!

And not everyone wants to necessarily “out” themselves to near strangers.

Heck, I’ll still try and flirt.

But what additional options are there?

1) Online

H and I have had a lot of fun on online dating sites.

We are on a local swingers site, the very popular OKCupid as well as Fetlife for a more kinky group of prospective friends, playmates and partners.

We are upfront about who we are – what our approach to relationships is, that we value honesty at every step of the way – i.e. deception is the only hard and fast “no no” in our books. We are honest about what we are looking for.

Essentially, we are unicorn hunting but with an open mind for other relationships.

We get quite a few “curious” responses – people who have some questions about polyamory.

We have made a number of really fun, sexy, open and intelligent online friends who we haven’t met for simple geography.

And then we have also met some playmates, some very close friends, and some that have been more than those combined <3

With regards to openness, when someone we’ve met online becomes a part of our day-to-day social lives, we know how to introduce them.

Certain friends know that we are polyamorous, and how we met the people we have dated. Others need not know, and think we met out clubbing or at mutual friends parties etc.

Of course, we’ll still get the odd look from the latter crowd when we’re spotted holding hands or making out, but this is a slightly separate issue – of how you choose to manage your time and mix different circles when you are in polyamorous relationships. I believe if I am in a relationship with someone, I should not have to hide that relationship.

2) People you already know

Dating people you already know has a lot of advantages in terms of compatibility.

As with any scenario of dating friends – whether polyamorous or not – certain risks are inherent. Whether fuck buddies or looking to be long-term romantic partners, the risk of a fall out that ruins a previously excellent relationship must be considered.

One potential problem comes in with mutual friends – not everyone is going to be comfortable with their best friends’ wife banging their roommate. Oh well.

I have had a fuck-buddy set up with a very close friend of H and mines. When he started dating, seriously, another good friend of all of ours, we (after a very fun night that ended in a near- or soft-threesome), ended the fuck-buddy set up. Fortunately for us, we had been certain from the start that this was nothing more than two very good friends having some XXX fun between the sheets – neither one of us was interested in the other romantically, and neither one of us ever got confused about that.

Of course, all of this requires two ingredients: awesome people and open communication.

3) Swingers clubs, nude beaches and similar more “risqué” venues.

Discretion seems to be central to these places, so that’s a bonus.

That said, if you’re looking for more old fashioned slow dating, you might find these options too “fuck now talk later”.

But then again that would be your choice.

~ If you want a bit of no strings attached sexy fun, these options are for you.

~ If you are comfortable enough to laugh off sexual come-ons and explain with a smile that you’re looking for something that starts with friendship, then, again – go ahead and try em. You might strike it lucky and meet someone(s) really special.

Until then, happy Unicorn Hunting!

*STDs have not been brought into this topic but of course are relevant – always take precautions: know your status, share your status, use condoms.

A round-about way to dinner

2011-03-19T05:27:00.000-07:00

“Shall I go past the shops on the way?” I asked.

“No, no. Come home first” H said.

I got home and he pointed to the middle of the lounge.

“Stand there”

I stood.

“Now. Take your shoes off.”

I slipped one pump off, and then the other.

“Pants. Off.”

I unbuttoned my pants and slid them past my hips, letting them drop to floor before I stepped out of them.

“Picke em up. Fold em. Neeeatly. Now give them here”

I hung my pants over his arm.

“Now. Take your panties off."

"Here, put your pants back on now” he handed me my pants as I stood bottomless in the centre of our living room.

I put my pants back on and he told me to go to the shops.

It being just past 5pm, the shops were busy with everyone hurrying to get their dinners worth. I could feel my pants rubbing against my increasingly wet pussy. My cheeks flushing ever so slightly.

When I got home H told me to unpack the shopping, and then go to our bedroom, set out my favourite toys, get undressed and select a pair of high heels to wear. Put on the blindfold, and then to wait for him.

I took my time laying out toys on either side of the bed and chose a set of silvery-white stiletto peep-toe heels. I then lay on the bed, naked apart from the shoes and black blindfold.

I heard H’s footsteps in the corridor. He entered and immediately grabbed my wrist, restraining me one wrist, then one ankle, at a time.

He started licking me and caressing me, and was soon vigorously rubbing his fingers inside me, and twirling his tongue over my hardened clit.

H lent over and grabbed something, and then I felt him slowly pressing into my well lubed ass. As he did so, he fucked my pussy with a vibrating toy.

Not letting me come, he moved his body upwards. With one hand still fucking me with a toy, he used the other to pres down on my neck and tap his dripping cock on my lips. I gasped for his cock, but he teased me – dragging and tapping the tip on my mouth.

Eventually, he pushed my head back and stuck his cock deep into my mouth as my body convulsed my pussy squeezed the toy away with powerful spasms.

I licked and sucked and breathed in his cock until my body stopped squirming and he moved away from my hot faced and started pounding my wet swollen pussy with his own wet swollen hardon.

As my body kicked and pulled on the restraints with more contractions, I felt H’s warm release shoot forcefully onto my face and neck.

I lay still for a while before H unclipped one hand and told me I could release my other limbs. I pulled the blind fold off and released myself. Still nude, apart from the stilettos, I prepared dinner.

love, lust, limerance and infatuation

2011-02-15T08:22:00.000-08:00

redefining "whore"

2011-02-10T01:02:00.000-08:00

"in an instant, I have become a whore" writes a redditor, assuming "whore" is a bad quality.

I have recently had a number of emails from people grappling with their female partners' sex-negativity. It makes me genuinely sad to think of the number of women (and equally men) out there who have a hard time embracing and accepting their sexual selves.

The world would be a better place were it filled with whores restores my faith that at least I am not alone in feeling that way.

The author writes:

"Perhaps that is why “sex education” is really just an indoctrination program for kids to learn that sex is “A primal, totally biological, urge, solely for the purpose of procreation, and that unrestrained sexuality (lust, “praise the lord”) will result in pain, suffering, loss and inevitably death.” Unknowingly parents retard their daughters from growing into their true power with a constant assault of morality tales and horror stories about how all boys want to rape them. And what has this “education” done? We have a planet of chronic masturbating boys who don’t have the first clue about how to make love, and an equal number of systemically unhappy, repressed, unfulfilled, perpetually depressed women who now have a hard time reaching orgasm through any method of stimulation, and are unable to be the true teachers to the men in their lives."

The author ends by redefining "whore" (much like The Ethical Slut authors redefine "slut"):

"Whore: (Noun) A sexual shaman. A woman who has embraced her true sexuality and is in complete control of whom, and how many, partners she decides to express her love with; a master of the art of sexuality who explores the boundaries of love and the physical universe through sexuality."

The post ends:

"Let all of us aspire to be whores!"

Now that is something I can get with!

agony - the good kind

2011-02-02T03:07:00.000-08:00

I walk through the door.

H is blocking the corridor.

It is clear – I am to turn into the bedroom.

He follows. Presses me down. No hands! No touching!

He proceeds to lick and kiss and rub and fuck me.

Rolling orgasms.

The intensity is agonisingly blissful.

* H had been away for a while. We had had some very fun, incredibly hot and dirty chats and video skypes. This is how he treated me when he was back at home.

Some Q & A

2011-01-31T04:33:00.000-08:00

So we had a few questions about polyamory. I answered and am keeping the response here.

I am very pro-discussion, I think there are far too many things in life that are taken for granted without question and communicating about these things is a good way to be open to questioning them... if that makes sense...including the idea that monogamous relationships are a superior format for relationships. It works for some, but not all (most relationships fail, after all).

Let me start by saying that there are lots of really great blogs etc dedicated to Polyamory. Two brilliant books are The Ethical Slut and Sex at Dawn which are great reads for anyone regardless of their preferred relationship format - they cover things about jealousy and lust and love in a very mature, objective manner.

We grew up in a world where the predominant relationship format is monogamy (or a series of mono relationships, anyway) – it was not always like this, but more recent historic times have favoured the nuclear family and monogamy … there are interesting articles on that if you want to know more -- but because of this, we often associate love and sex with each other and with a "one-true-love" ideal – and we find people get insanely jealous for things as simple as their partner using porn or having fantasies about other people/role play etc, and of course cheating and all the heart break that goes with that. It took me a long time, but I now realise that my husband has his own sexuality. His own heart. He chooses to share that with me but that does not mean I can/should try to restrict who else he shares that with.

www.reddit.com/r/polyamory is also great for posting interesting articles and discussing polyamory with other people (there is a good FAQ there too).

Ok, your questions:

1) What about std's? I mean, it's serious risk, especially if you're open to many relationships.

Yes, this is, of course, a concern. You get different types of polyamorous people and the different formats will have different solutions for this. Swingers, for example, are having sex with different partners without commitment or even friendship necessarily. They would probably all like to answer that routine tests are done and condoms used etc.

We are not swingers, though. We are somewhere between that and polyfidelity, which is having multiple committed relationships - i.e. having a husband and a girlfriend, but not sleeping with anyone other than those two, would be one format of a polyfidel relationship.

I say "somewhere in between" because essentially we are looking for those second/third long-term relationships and so we are dating a bit.

In that case, we use the same precautions any single person would - talking openly about status, and using protection.

I'm pretty damned scared of STDs and try to be responsible about the risks. I must say though that I, for example, have slept with fewer people in total than most (all?) of my straight / monogamous friends - the only difference is that some of them have overlapped in time as opposed to occuring in a series.

2) Aren't either of you scared that one of you will fall more intellectually/andor physically for someone else then your fixed significant other if you're open to close engagement with other people outside of your own relationship?

Fear is an interesting thing. Whenever one of us is afraid, we talk about it and try to figure out exactly what it is we are afraid of. Usually that helps a lot, because often what we are afraid of is not really a threat.

We actually hope that we will fall deeply in love with other people, that we will find great intellectual compatibility and physical attraction.

I am a very loving person, I have always found it easy to really love people and provide unconditional support and nurture for them. I have loved multiple people simultaneously without ever feeling like one of them was somehow losing out as a result.

I use the comparison of children – if you have one child, and love it, and then have a second and love it, does that mean you now have less love for the first child? Probably not. If anything, it may mean you have even more love for the first one than before, with all its uniqueness in comparison to the second (and visa versa).

Of course, there are very practical issues here – we can’t be too philosophical about it. New relationships, for example, have high energy – that new relationship buzz – you have to be careful to still make time for the original relationship while everything kinda settles down. It obviously also helps a lot if all people involved get along, or even better yet, function as a romantic group – all partners in romantic relationships with all others. That is fairly rare to find, but it happens.

As for the specific “more” in your question… we are committed to each other, we are married and have been together since we were kids. Right now I cannot imagine loving someone more than I love H. all love I have ever felt for different people has been unique in its own way. I think instead of being “more” in like/lust/love, we would just be differently in like/lust/love.

We are very open that we are polyamorous with people we would date/sleep with, so hopefully no one would enter into a relationship with us if they intended to “steal” one of us away. And we communicate, exceptionally well, about our feelings at every step of the way. I have recently been a bit overwhelmed with some emotions for someone I/we have been seeing, and mr has been my best friend and #1 confidant in dealing with these emotions. In this way, I hope that we would recognise any risks to our relationship very early on and decide together how to deal with it.

If one of us were really to decide they wanted to have a monogamous relationship with someone else, that would be very sad. But right now that fear of losing one another is not real, there is no threat right now and so we have no good reason for us to “give up” loving others, experimenting with others etc – we don’t own one another, we are companions and partners but his emotions and fantasies and dreams etc are not mine to control or own (and visa versa)… I hope that I can be unconditional in my love to him even to the extent of not requiring lifelong commitment as a condition for that love… though, we both very much want to spend “forever” together – we are each others’ favourite people in the whole world and I don’t foresee that changing significantly – we’ve known each other more than half of our lives and that will always be there no matter how our relationship may or may not change.

We intend fully on staying together - our relationship is the strongest it has ever been, and we both feel very secure in it because we are open about everything, even the "bad things" many others would sweep under the carpet or hide from each other etc. Also, mr remains and continues to be by far the best lover I have ever had… so there would be a real challenger needed to outperform there! (lol)

In fact, I think this fear is less relevant for us - people in mono relationships might also meet someone and fall for them, and likely be far less equipped to cope with and/or adjust to that.

3) How do you deal with the perception of people who are shocked with your life-style if they are an integral part of your life? (like family, employers, employees etc.)

This is…difficult!! We are sort of “in the closet” but not really – a lot of our friends know because we were open with them when first exploring the idea and I have had some fuck-buddy type relationships with some good friends. Some of them are very cool and others have out-right defriended us for “sordid” behaviour (Again, I’ve slept with fewer people than these guys, but somehow because I sleep with both genders and some people at the same time/same time as being married, it is more sordid than their string of hetero one night stands! Lol!). I am not too phased by that as those tended to be people who we didn’t have too much left in common with, anyway. I must say I am very appreciative of many of our friends – they have been used to seeing the two of us together as a couple for over a decade, and now must process us being open, and recently me having a girl around with me a lot of the time, with whom I am very comfortable to publically display affection towards. On the whole, they ask questions and express concern and I answer openly. I think some have jumped to their own conclusions, but hopefully time will prove them wrong.

H’s brother knows and is totally cool with it all. My mother must suspect it as she has seen some of our books on poly and more on our book wish list … but the rest of the family we have not told yet. If/when there is a more serious relationship that warrants being shared, we will either cross that bridge or burn it (so to speak!)

Employers do not need to know, and do not know.

Veganism is harder. lol.

4) Where does love come in? Do you believe that someone can love more than one person at a time? (I do) Or that there are different kinds of romantic love? Or that it's just an abstract concept-lable used to describe a strong mental/biological state?

I think I have answered this already – we most certainly believe that people can love more than one person at the same time, that there are different forms and formats for love and relationships and that these should be free to form (and crash, if that’s the way it goes).

I think love is a mental and biological state, but it is also something that you do. And often there is a disconnect between that state and how we act – to me, love is really about feeling strong affection, concern, care and appreciation for a person. Sometimes we confuse that with wanting to be them (and change ourselves) or wanting to own them (and change them)

hope that helps! :-)

On unrequited love

2011-01-19T05:56:00.000-08:00

H and I have been building a really incredible friendship with a super hot fun smart talented caring dudette.

I like her – I actually like who she is (even the asshole inside her;-P) and how she is. I respect her – she’s honest about who she is and what she wants.

We make out a lot and I am…well, really attracted to her. When we kiss my whole body tingles, my face gets warm, my heart beats faster… and I get very - very - horny. When I touch her all I can think about is touching her more, tasting her everywhere… making her squirm.

Liking + attraction can sometimes => love.

This scares the shit out of me. With T… its different. I love him as a friend, and we fuck like fuck buddies. There has never been any kind of romantic desire, for lack of a better description. The same applies for other girl-friends I make out with – they are friends with whom its fun to mess around – physical pleasure or a wild night out, with lots of laughter and shenanigans and a very light heart.

With dudette the heart is a little heavier.

Love is a strong word.

I’m not in love, and doubt I love her, but I can see how I definitely could love her… in all honestly this feels a lot like when H and I first started with our secret kisses… and that’s what scares me. I am afraid of unrequited love.

So this got me thinking – is unrequited love something to be afraid of? Why would it scare me?

Simply asking the question has already subdued the fear.

One of the things I like most about myself is my ability to love – to really love – many different people. And the people who I love I love unconditionally – I want the best for them and am joyful when good things come their way. How can I be so unselfish in my love for people like T & other friends and be so selfish to expect reciprocated love – or more specifically, love reciprocated in the way that I crave it…

What is it that I would expect – if I am afraid of unrequited love, that means I would prefer (or expect) love requited.

But I know that love can be there, it can be real, without it being physical or committed or monogamous or any of those traditional set ups we associated with people who love one another. Is it not possible that we can love one another without these expectations – that we expect nothing of each other, but give our love freely?

Because what is someone “suffering heroically from unrequited love” really suffering – they are suffering the lack of companionship they desire with the object of their love. That is selfish love. That is narcissistic – where being “in love” becomes more about being loved – requiring an extension of your ego, requiring many things – as opposed to offering many things.

What forms can love take if we offer our love for free and demand nothing in return?

If you believe in karmic energy it might be a comforting thought that sending love-vibes out will never be needless, because it will always come back.

That may be of some consolation. But am I looking for consolation? I don’t think that I am…

I have read some things arguing that unrequited love is an addiction, its craziness to love someone unconditionally when they do not return that love. But is that statement not a contradiction in itself? Is applying reciprocation as a condition, not breaking unconditional love?

Love is something that you do – it transcends definitions of relationship forms and boundaries and roles. And I like loving people.

Do I desire dudette? Yes, yes I do. Will it break my heart if she doesn’t fulfil my desire? No – love is separate from desire, desire is selfish, love is unselfish.

I think I can love her without the condition that my desire be fulfilled by her.

“I think if one truly loves someone, one is not dependent on the other’s response, and even if one’s love is not returned in kind, one can wish the other person well with all of one’s heart and move on with one’s life. Freeing ourselves, and making our love a positive force in itself, will free us of the burden of unrequited love.” Swati Chopra

Hopefully my desire doesn’t lead me to a state of limmerance – an intense crush, a cognitive obsession with the idea of gaining requited love.

asofterworld

Whats in a label?

2011-01-19T02:39:00.000-08:00

I have been becoming more and more open about who I am and how I live my life. Naturally, this has attracted a lot of criticism a la

bisexual = promiscuous

promiscuous + polyamorous = bipolar + psychopathic

Ok. well fine. My ability to love multiple people is something I am proud of. But to others its sordid and my lovers are mere toys.

I think hey foxy puts it really well:

"Multiple partners are acceptable, provided that they do not occur simultaneously....A 24 year old woman who has slept with 12 men, one after another, having dated them for six months each, would be considered normal. Another 24 year old woman who had slept with 12 men during the same time period, the first she was in a long term relationship with, and the others during that relationship, would generally be thought of as promiscuous and immoral—even if her partner was ok with the affairs.In fact, she would most likely be seen as more immoral if the affairs occurred during an open relationship. All of this despite the fact that she found a way to maintain a committed relationship for 12 times as long as the first girl."

H doesn't think of me in this way. He gets on well with my other lovers and friends... and has an incredible lesbro relationship with my current cuddle-buddy/friend-with-makeout-benefits. She's awesome, why wouldn't he like her?

While we're talking labels, I'll direct you to an articulate description of why someone would call themselves "queer" as opposed to bisexual or pansexual. snowcrocus says:

"I just find the term queer fits me best, in the sense of meaning not-straight and with a connotation of political/social activism. This describes me pretty well. I'm also a strange person, unrelated to my sexual orientation, so that works for me, too. I like that it doesn't imply I agree there are only two genders, or that someone has to fall into only one or the other, or even that very much is determined by our gender in the first place. Furthermore, I like that it doesn't have the word "sexual" in it at all. Yes, sexual orientation does talk about our sexuality, but I consider that to be such a small facet of my life that even just that simple structural difference in the word appeals to me - we have gay and lesbian, but every other alternative I've heard for bisexual includes -sexual."

warmth

2011-01-17T23:59:00.000-08:00

between my legs

Untitled

2011-01-17T23:54:00.000-08:00

I want to operate on the night with you

Slice it open and examine its viscera

Stitch it closed with thorny vines

Leave vena cavae poking through,

Sucking the day time in

Bubbling in the nocturnal blood,

I want to charter the day with you

Wash its surface and stare

At the returned likeness of your gaze

I'm so glad to share affection with someone without forcing either emotional distance or obligation.

risky is sexy

2011-01-07T06:47:00.000-08:00

Public indecency can be pretty hot.

Even stories,
Smut,
Receive
Looks of mixed arousal
And disapproval.

greek goddess of love

2011-01-07T06:16:00.000-08:00

C was having a calm day at work and decided to see if any newbies wanted to chat. A few of the usual ones were around, making small talk but not much else. After a while a new profile came up… a greek goddess… she had smooth olive skin, long silky hair and a sultry smile. Goddess started chatting … a bit more lively chat than others had been offering that day, the two shared stories of fantasies, photos and had soon declared their undying love (lust?) for one another.

Being separated by a continent and sea, the two spent a few months chatting regularly, having hot cyber-sex and sharing erotic photos and videos – each one exposing a little more of the girls’ sexualities, desires, needs and abilities…

Overtime just the thought of goddess would get C wet and riled up… enough to demand an immediate smoke break, if not a more direct, private, relief.

Then a surprising mail came – just words? No pictures or videos? Goddess would be coming to visit – she’d be staying near by.

As the arrival drew nearer, C became a bit nervous – what would she be like in real life? Would she be able to handle her sexually? What if everything went perfectly and goddess had to return to Greece? These thoughts filled her mind, but her heart still pounded faster and her body grew warmer at the very thought of seeing, touching… kissing her own goddess.

They met a day after goddess’s arrival, in the hotel bar where she was staying. C greeted her with a hug, and let her arm gently linger around the slim waist of her online friend. The sexual heat was there immediately, the two barely letting each other go while they quietly sipped their drinks. Goddess was not shy and soon asked her “love” to come up to the room with her. C followed, her heart racing….

The room was light and large – there was a tall, wide and soft bed with crisp white linen, and a small armour at the opposite end of the room. There were no couches or other seating area, so goddess (conveniently) perched herself on the foot of the bed. Leaning back a bit, she loosened her hair letting the long, silky locks fall backwards. C stood watching and then moved closer, positioning herself between the legs of the goddess she had for months fantasised about.

The goddess looked up at C, through her long dark eyelashes, and said nothing. C moved down closer and pressed her lips gently against the lush, warm lips of her friend. Breathing the citrusy smell of perfume, she felt her body loosen as she gently leaned her goddess back. Placing one arm around her waist, C lifted the sultry greek higher onto the bed and pressed her body harder against her new lovers’ body, kissing her deeper this time.

Feeling her goddess's chest rise with each heavy breath, the temptation grew and C’s hands were soon running up under the short dress and over the soft curves of her goddess’s large breast, hearing a whimper as she found the hard nipples.

C felt her lovers’ hands wrap around her waist and lift her shirt up. C slowly lifted herself up so she was sitting on her goddess, her own topless body presented for the first time, and soon enjoyed with gentle goddess kisses.

All fears gone, C pulled the dress over her goddess’s already flushed face and pressed her hand against her panties, feeling warmth. She moved her fingers around and tucked her lovers’ panties sideways, revealing the shaven, glistening pussy she had enjoyed on-line many times before.

But the goddess pushed C over, tugging her jeans down, burying her face in C’s throbbing, moist pussy. Licking her clit, she gently lets the tips of her fingers enter C’s tight, soft opening. As C moans in pleasure, her goddess touches herself with one hand and gently, slowly, licks and sucks… tastes... C’s swelling pussy.

C pushed her goddess off her, pinned her down with both hands as she kisses her deeply – tasting herself in her lovers’ mouth - and moved down her olive-toned stomach to return the favour. One hand pressing firmly on her goddess’s chest bone, she held her down while she used the other and her tongue to rub, press, lick and pound her lover the way she’d watched her do to herself so many times before…

C moaned in response to her goddess’s writhing hips and the slow, increasing pulsations of her lovers’ pussy. Mumbling in greek as first, and then screaming out to C, the goddess’s stomach, then hips, lifted and pounded back down as C felt her pussy clamp in multiple contractions around her finger.

Letting her hand lift off the goddess’s chest, C moved slowly up and kissed the sweet-smelling neck of her goddess, as she hears the simple words “I love you, you are mine”.

virginity

2010-11-09T07:12:00.000-08:00

reddit is having a little discussion on virginity

One user, sambojomo, had the following to say which was just too good not to replicate here:

"I hate the concept of virginity and avoid using the word to describe people that are sexually inexperienced. I think it's archaic and inherently puritanical. I hate the idea of "losing" your virginity, when you don't really lose anything, in fact you gain a new experience and also it gives value to the state of being sexually inexperienced. I hate the idea of "stealing" someone's virginity which implies that there is value in being sexually inexperienced. Same goes for any other term that implies the same thing such as deflowering. Virginity is synonymous with pure, untainted, fresh, clean, innocent and other sweet adjectives. This would mean that having sex is bad and dirty and shameful and that is something that I just don't believe in."

What is the real value of virginity? Is there any value at all? Is it just another social construct used to impose oppressive value systems?

Another night with T

2010-11-02T05:30:00.000-07:00

So I had another night with T.

I was not expecting to sleep with him again, so I wasn’t…erm, primped and prepared, but it was actually the most fun of all the nights we’ve spent together, for me anyway.

There was something different… a new carelessness/ openness/ freedom between us – these lowered inhibitions combined with a lot more talking than before resulted in a fair amount of fun..Him going at me while we were driving home...me straddling him on the couch...taking a quick shower together and laughing at his bum in the mirror...followed by a night/morning of lots of oral & fucking (*grins*).

T wanted anal but I declined… mostly because H had requested we don’t do that. Also because T doesn’t seem to feel comfortable even putting his finger any where near my ass, and given his size I’m pretty sure this would need a LOT of build-up which quite frankly I was not up to talking him through….

Thankfully, I got some amazing anal when H came home – I told him T had asked for it and H just went straight for my ass, making me come a few times in the build-up and actual fucking – and I didn’t have to talk him through a thing.

...having H ready me for T, well, now, that would be hot.

fluid

2010-10-28T06:50:00.000-07:00

I always thought I was about a two on the Kinsey Scale but recently I think I could be 3. I've been reading Effing Dykes (love love love it!) and other lesbian media... I watched "Lost and Delirious" the other evening. I went to an all-girls school much like the one in the film. I cried and cried and cried for the hell some of the lesbian girls went through.

(side note: the girls are pretty damn hot. the one reminds me of a certain someone who I'd like to.... go on a date with)

The more I reflect on teen-years, the more I realise I was totally bi but just didn't think it because, well, I've been with H since we were kids: basically, I had a boyfriend, I loved fucking him, therefore I must be straight.

FAIL.

I'm totally fucking queer. Always have been.

H has been travelling a lot lately. I miss him terribly when he is gone, and I miss who I am when he is around. It does make me wonder what/who I would be like should he ever leave my life... I think I would be a workaholic, who drinks vodka and smokes weed in the bath every night.

But then, I could also have a girlfriend and lots of cats. And be happy watching sappy lesbo movies.

(better yet is a happy 3some)

In the meantime, though, I am getting excited to primp myself for H's return... and have him tie me down, press me hard, take my mind away from itself and find that infinite loop of orgasms that only he and I know how to trace...

An education beyond the classroom

2010-10-27T04:50:00.000-07:00

I stumbled on this “study” on horizontal –academics. Its 52 slides but worth the read. Its quite harsh, but then you know I can be, too. And I think including the identities of the men (if real??) is crossing a line, big time. The value is in the types of things the author rates as good (pros, memorable moments) and bad (cons) about each “subject”.

Clearly, the author likes her sex rough, like me. And the dead-fish variety who just lie there making awkward faces lose out on rankings as a result. But I like what she’s doing – saying “Here I am. I slept with guys while at college. I’m not ashamed. Some were better than others, and here’s why”.

More women need to do this kind of thing, because there are still too many guys out there believing that every chic they take home from a bar is really in-lust with them – they are the first guy she’s ever done anything so naughty with – and that every girl they’ve ever been with has had an orgasm, had the best time of her life etc etc.

Rubbish.

People going home with other people from bars are doing so because they wanna get laid, and they wanna get laid good.

Some tantalising finds

2010-10-25T05:32:00.000-07:00

I haven't had much time to write lately, but here are a few good finds:

A great article on the need for sex-positivism and the launch of free porn. The concept is linked to anarchism and sex and love.

Reddit has a new r/bisexy sub filled with delicious pictures.... droooooooooool.

Its just me and my purple bullet at the moment, but hey at least I still get to sleep peacefully at the end :-)

update: sex with H, squirting and T

2010-10-07T05:24:00.000-07:00

Another month flown by. It's been a nice time for H and I to be just the two of us, I've really enjoyed it.

The sex seems to be getting exponentially better. I've never really been one to have overtly sexual thoughts about strangers - at most I'll notice they are attractive, but hardly ever actually visualise something sexual. Recently whenever I see a good looking guy I imagine him pinning me down and fucking me the way H does.

We've seen a couple of girls, one who is rediculously beautiful and a great personality, so we'll see. If nothing else I imagine we could become great friends.

H was away again this week, and I reached a personal mile stone: I squirted for the first time (and repeated every night since... you know, for science). With no gspot stimulation, just very direct clit stimulation. Now I know there is controversy around this - "is it pee?" etc. I don't have the answers, but if I were ever included in a study and asked to describe it I would say it feels like you're going to pee, but when you start squirting its not the same as a normal urination - its far more powerful. It also does not smell as strongly as urine. It was totally different to other orgasms (in fact, I'm not sure it counts as an orgasm on its own...getting there) as there were no contractions. To be perfectly honest, it feels like the body is saying "rigourous sexual activity identified. risk of urinary tract infection high. expell purified liquid at high pressure to cleans tract". So... fun? yes. Messy? yes. Pleasurable? yes, but I still want to keep going until a "real" orgasm. That's my perspective. I'm fascinated by the whole concept and would love to hear other people's thoughts.

While H has been away I have also hooked up with T again. This time more sober. To be honest, it was pretty lame again. There is emotional pleasure at the intimacy, and yes physical pleasure because, well, we're fucking, but very little psychological pleasure and a lack of purposeful for-her- enjoyment physical pleasure. At one stage, it actually got to the point where I was hoping he would just finish...my thoughts were all about all the awesome things H would have been doing to me/letting me do if it were with him. I really genuinely missed H. Yet, there's still something flattering and warming about the idea of sex with T... I guess its cos he's a jerk/chauvenist etc and perhaps I'm a more typical girl than I knew... hmmm. I do love him and enjoy the intimacy, and his huge cock is starting to, um, grow on me, too... heehe. I also know that it takes two to have good sex, and I need to be more vocal about what I want. (Which is, if anyone is interested: more clitoral stimulation, less pounding for the sake of pounding and more hitting-that-spot-at-the-right-frequency motion-of-the-ocean type stuff, and more god damned kink - talk dirty or pin me down, or let me pin you down, or let me at least suck your cock for more than a few seconds... slow down.... and maybe we'll even get to some ass play?)

H is back tomorrow, and I cannot wait! I want to suck him dry!

Fast Finnish Fucking

2010-09-02T07:48:00.000-07:00

By reddit request ... well, sort of...

S had been part of a volunteer group working in the rural areas and had decided to see a bit of the city before heading back to Finland. Her English wasn't very good but she figured with her decent grasp of a few European languages she'd get by with the help of tour guides, foreigners living in the City and multilingual locals.

In order to be close to a "global" crowd, she booked in to a backpackers in the CBD, on the main party street of town. She spent the week doing touristy things - she's hiked up the mountain, visited the national museums, seen local art galleries, spent some time on the beach, in the botanical gardens and visited a township. Most evenings, S had been too tired to party late - the tour guides kept the days busy with activities, and usually set off fairly early in the morning. Tonight was her last night in town (though she knew this was a place she'd be returning too), and S wanted to make sure her stay at the backpackers lived up to the party reputation of its location.

S started in the backpackers pub – she had met the bartended there who spoke a bit of French and they could communicate, albeit somewhat brokenly.

A roudy group of slightly younger people arrived fairly early – S could tell they had been partying all day, and she watched somewhat jealously as they all danced and laughed and joked around. S had noticed one of the girls with the group – R. R was tall and slim and had long, wild hair. She had a large smile and danced freely. R started dance-walking towards the bar, and S perked herself up a bit, wishing it were easier for her to start conversations with strangers.

H and R and indeed been socialising all day with their friends. H was standing at the bar waiting to order when R dance-walked toward him. R positioned herself between H’s legs and cuddled him, whispering “some nice chics here, eh?” to which H grinned “Indeed. Go get us some to take home”, and teasingly slapping R’s ass.

“Hmm…. What about……. Her!?” R asked, scanning the room and then nodding towards S.

“Yeah, she’s not bad”, H swallowed, taking a few more moments to absorb S’s beauty – slim, blond with large innocent looking eyes.

R sauntered casually closer to S and smiled at her. S smiled back, but didn’t budge from her stool, so R moved slightly closer and asked the barman for a drink, and turned to S and said “can I buy you something?”

S looked at the barman and then back at R and nodded, the barman placing two ciders on in front of R.

“I’m R”, R stuck her hand out toward S.

S took it, shook it and said “S”.

“Are you staying at the backpackers?”

S stared blankly and then said “I English quite bad”

“O. Ok. Where are you from?”

S hesitated, and then said “…Finland”

“Oh I see. I hope you’re having fun here. …. FUN?” questioned R

“Ah. Yes. Nice” said S.

The barman, sensing some difficulty with a friendly conversation, interrupted and said to R that it was S’s last night in the backpackers, she’d be going back tomorrow.

“Ah, well in that case you’d better come dance!” exclaimed R grabbing S with one hand and her drink with the other and dance-walking the two of them back to the dancefloor where the group of friends had now thoroughly taken over.

The girls swayed and moved around, being twirled between R- and H’s friends, while H sat watching from the bar. S wasn’t afraid to dance seductively, moving her body against R’s in sexy shows frequently. At some point, everyone decided to go to another club up the road, and R gestured for S to join them. S looked to the barman for approval, and on his re-assuring nod, followed the group down and out and then up the street to another, much fuller, dance club.

After a bit more dancing, R needed a break and found H on the balcony smoking a cigarette. R flopped down next to H and gently crossed her legs over his. S had followed her outside and the three sat on a bench together, watching the activity in the street below.

“You girls having fun?”H asked

“Mhhm” R responded giving him a peck on the jawline.

Surprisingly, S acted similarly – agreeing with “Yess. Many of fun!” and pecking R on the cheek.

“It feels like one of those nights I could see the sun come up” mused R.

“Well, I know you two are having fun dancing, but I’m not sure I can stay here until the sun comes up!” teased H.

Misunderstanding slightly, S queried “Where we go now? Where go to see sun?”

H and R laughed and bumped foreheads, while R comfortingly placed her hand on S’s thigh. Feeling a bit cold herself, R wrapped an arm around S and rubbed her arm upper arm.

“Its no cold. Finland see cold!” laughed S, returning the gesture so that the three were now sitting very close, with arms and legs wrapped casually around one another.

“Well, which beaches have you been to, S?” asked H.

“Beach” repeated R.

“Oh, um, ze beach? We go the beach with the birds?” S tried to figure it out.

“Oh, Boulders! With the penguins?” R asked

“Penguins! Yes!” S nodded.

“Oh, no we won’t go there. That’s a bit far. There’s a nice beach near-by – Clifton” H said.

“Oh I hear Clifton” S responded, making R and H giggle a bit at her broken language.

“Do you want to go? We can watch the sunrise?” R asked, cautious of making the foreigner feel uncomfortable.

“Yes! We go!” S jumped up.

Rather suddenly, the three were making their way down out of the club and toward the taxis. A few silent minutes in the taxi and the three were dropped off at the beach.

The beach was empty. The waves relatively calm, lit only by the moon. The trio made their way down the winding stairs, H gently helping them down, and found a spot nestled between the boulders, facing the ocean. In the cottages surrounding the beach, not a single light was on.

Sitting quietly, taking in the scenary and fresh air, R leaned in for a kiss. H's lips were warm against her own. S let out a loud sigh next to them and placed a hand gently on R's knee.

R looked up and asked "Do you like girls?"

Its unclear whether or not S understood exactly what had been asked, but either way she seemed to be in tune with the possibilities before the trio and leaned in to kiss R. S didn't hesitate to prod her tongue gently between R's lips and soon the two women were embraced - arms around each others necks and moaning lightly as they made out.

H sat patiently and enjoyed the show, only joining in when S sat up onto her knees and lifted R's shirt off her head. H softly touched his wife's breast and then moved to kiss them. S followed and R leaned back, with a relaxing sigh, as the two kissed her chest, and found each others mouths just above R's belly-button.

S and H kissed for a while, H rubbing his hands along R's thighs and R gently unbottoning S's cute dress - from the top down.

R and H enjoy fairly rough sex when it is just the two of them, and had enjoyed outdoor sex on numerous occasions, but were wairy of how comfortable S was. She seemed to be taking the lead, though, and helped R with the last few buttons, letting her dress fall back onto the sand behind her, leaving her kneeling in nothing but her pretty pink panties, the soft night light reflecting on her snow-white Finnish skin.

R gently pushed S backward with one hand placed on S's chest, and her head moving slowly down. S was now leaning far back, and R could breath over and kiss S's only remaining article of clothing. R's own pussy was warm and wet with anticipation, and she could feel S's growing warmer as she gently flicked her tongue over S's clit, through the in-tact panties. R did this, all the while holding one hand firmly on S's chest, keeping her bent over backward, still on her knees.

H had slid R's pants off from behind while this was going on, and was himself enjoying feeling R's clit grow as he teased it with his fingers and warm breath. With growing excitement, R pulled S's panties slightly down, not allowing her to raise her body off her knees, and slid a finger gently between the slit in S's soft white thighs, finding a moist spot and flicking lightly upward.

"Uuuuuuuuuuuh, Ya!" S groanded with enjoyment.

R was particularly excited by this and rammed herself backward in H as he fingered her more vigorously now. H playfully slapped her ass, as he often does. Suprisingly, this made S sit up and look at what H was doing for the first time - she grinned widely and moved herself over to switch places with R.

S eagerly moved her face and tongue over R's stomache, thighs and pussy as H fingered and licked her from behind. Picking up on S's earlier reaction, H gently slapped S on her round, white bottom. This made S squirm, thrust herself backward and raise her arse a little higher, so H repeated, this time a little harder.

S was mimicking what R had previosuly done - she held her hand firmly on R's chest - between R's small, pert breasts - nipple hard and dark. R pushed gently and playfully back, before succumbing to the pleasure and letting out a long, deep, loud moan as her pussy began a set of slow, deep, hard contractions - the kind of orgasm that can just keep going for what seems like an eternity. The pleasure becoming too much, R pushes S to the side, gently rubbing her own cunt as she slid down lower to be underneath, then using the same hand to join H's tongue around S's now-dripping pussy.

R kissed at S's breasts and rubbed her clit as H prepared to enter S from behind - doing so in one swift ahrd motion he entered her fast and deep, forcing S's body to jolt forward as she jelped with joy. H grabbed her left leg and moved it so that both S's legs were on the to the side of R, who still lay on her back rubbing S's clit with one hand and her own with the other. H fucked S from behind, thrusting deep, fast and hard into her as he watched his wife masturbate.

R lifted her head to kiss S, but H quickly grabbed S's hair, wrapping the blonde strands around his hand, and tugged so that S's head lifted out of R's immediate reach.

R moaned as she tried to reach S, H warning her not to with telling eyes and R submissive, even to just her husband's look.

R still rubbing herself and S simultaneously, H continued to pound S. Holding her hair firmly with one hand, H used the other to slap S's perfectly shaped ass three times before resting his hand there and sliding it gently toward S's crack. As he did so, S started grunting loudly - perhaps in Finnish though disticntion between words was inaudible as she moanded and cursed loudly, eventually flopping down forward onto her chest, ass still in the air.

H pulled out as R moved toward him, first licking S's sopping pussy before tiltinger her face sideways and taking H between her lips, as his warm juices squirted out and mixed with the taste of S in her mouth.

The three flopped backward, breathless and lay in silent, heaving piles for a few moments. Once they'd caught their breath, they sat up to realise that the sun was now rising, and a few lights had come on in the beach bungalows of the wealthy.

I wonder if we have a sense of humour about this yet? To soon?

2010-08-19T02:45:00.000-07:00

http://pissgirls.tumblr.com/

"She is such a slut!"

2010-08-17T23:55:00.000-07:00

Redditors were torn when a christian man asked for advice on getting his wife to be more "slutty" and to let out her "inner whore". It seems some took offence to those terms, which to me where quite clearly used as sex-positive terms, not disrespect for his wife.

Reclaiming derogatory terms can be a powerful thing. In The Ethical Slut, Dossie & Cat redefine "slut" as a positive thing. It does not mean promiscuous, it does not mean dirty or cheap or any of the other derogatory meanings. It refers to someone who is in touch with their sexuality and takes control over getting their own pleasure - whether it be alone, with a monogamous partner, or with multiple partners. Dossie & Cat settle on this definition:

"A slut is a person of any gender who has the courage to lead life according to the radical proposition that sex is nice and pleasure is good for you."

Society has a huge amount of confusion around sexuality - myths that men are permanently horny and single-minded, while women are never horny, not visually stimulated, degraded by porn, passive and so forth.

In reality genders are more complex than man/woman, and sexuality is exponentially more complex than active/passive.

Constructed morality, gender roles and concepts of purity attempt to simplify this, and results in a vocabulary that is not fitting to describe what is really going on with individuals' sexualities.

I'll leave you with a few relevant quotes found on one of my favourite blogs - sex is not the enemy

Sluthood isn’t a disease, or a wrong path, or a trend that’s ruining our youth. It isn’t just for detached, unemotional women who “fuck like men,” (as if that actually meant something), consequences be damned. It isn’t ever inevitable that sluthood should inspire violence or shame. Sluthood isn’t just a choice we should let women make because women should be free to make even “bad” choices. It’s a choice we should all have access to because it has the potential to be liberating.

Jaclyn Friedman (My Sluthood, Myself)

Despite how easy it is to be labeled a slut, it’s possible, one could imagine, if you try really hard, to avoid being tarred with the slut brush. If you dress properly and never drink too much and don’t flirt and don’t have sex and never think a sexual thought ever, you could probably escape the shame-fest, right? Wrong! Because, as Therese has discovered as she’s traveled around the country talking to people about virginity, the same culture that scorns women for being sexual also scorns them for not being sexual! Just as you can be slut-shamed, you can be prude-shamed or virgin-shamed! Shame for everyone!

“Slut Panel” postmortem: Shame, shame, go away - Feministing

So it’s really up to young women to fix this mess; we have to take the lead. Young women need to not just ignore the double standard, but to actively fight it by being proud of sex. I’m not saying you should hand out flyers with all the names of your sexual partners and a play-by-play of your favorite positions. But there’s a lot of power in just telling the truth without any shame. If you lie about the number of people you have sex with, or if you call another girl a slut… you’re supporting the notion that it’s not okay for women to have sex when they want to, or with as many people as they want to.

Jessica Valenti (from ‘Full Frontal Feminism: A Young Woman’s Guide to Why Feminism Matters’)

If we lived in a society in which women’s sexuality was celebrated, and was seen as usually proactive rather than usually passive, I don’t think people would jump so quickly to the concepts of exploitation and dehumanization when they thought of female performers.

Porn star Lorelei Lee talks obscenity - Salon.com

I am always annoyed when people shame girls and women by calling them sluts. The very premise rests on the idea that sex is something that degrades women, which is a facet of sex-negativity. In a sex-positive world, calling someone out for having sex would make as much sense as calling them out for breathing or eating.

Dr. Charlie Glickman - Slut Shaming Doesn’t Sparkle

There are lots of people, though, who don’t think about what they’re saying when they call a girl a slut. ‘Do you mean she has a lot of sex? Sex is fun. Why is that bad?’ actually gets a pretty thoughtful response, especially if someone’s using the word in a way unconnected to sex. ‘Do you mean you think she’s mean and you don’t like her?’

Paper Cuts and Plastic

Let's talk about Sex

2010-08-16T06:14:00.000-07:00

reddit has a discussion going about talking to friends about sex.

Redditor bmbp has hit the nail on the head with his/her response, so I'm sharing here:

"it's just sex for chrissakes. My great great great great great great grandmothers all fucked and I hope they did it with wild, lusty abandon. If it's good enough for all of my great great great great great great grandmas, why the hell would it be something to be ashamed of? And if it's not something to be ashamed of, why not talk about it? I mean, if we don't talk about it, how are we going to learn anything new?
This week, I learned about a new way to do the Scissors because I was talking about it. Why wouldn't I want to squeeze every last possible ounce of pleasure out of life?"

The post reminded me of my grandmother:

It was my grandmother who planted the very first seed of sex-positivism in me. She and my grandad prioritised their sex life - they made "quiet time" a part of every day family routine for them to have an hour or two in the bedroom between work & dinner and did the deed right up until my grandad's last few months - he still complained to the dr when they could no longer do it more than a year into his leukemia in his 70s.

When I was 14 we went on a family holiday, and my boyfriend - yes, H - came with us. We were very sexual (sleeping together for a few months by that stage) and I think this freaked the adults out a bit, understandably in retrospect. My gran pulled me aside and said that we should def have sex as soon as we are ready cos its very important for a relationship to be sexually compatible. To that date, no one had ever spoken to me about sex in such as adult manner, no one had ever spoken about sex as a positive/essential aspect of a relationship, as a non-scary, non-threatening thing etc. I'll remember it forever!

On Sex with H

2010-08-13T01:53:00.000-07:00

I think I suffer quite a lot from “sexual amnesia”. When I sit down to write about a fantasy, the details flow… When I sit down to write an account of a real event, the details are fuzzy. I wanted to write some more about what sex with H is like, but find it difficult to tell a story from beginning to end.

So, things that H does that stand out when I try to write about sex I’ve had with him:

• Waits for me to make the first move. He’ll sit/stand/lie still, give me a look, but not budge until I come in for a kiss and a grope. Even when he has a hardon.
• He never hesitates to go down on me. And he does it properly. He treats my clit like a bubblegum lollipop. He uses his entire body to do it. And smiles at me (in that way that made me melt when we were 13, and still makes me melt today), and groans, to let me know he’s enjoying it.
• He’ll take control over my position, and twist and contort my body so that I’m all bundled up, just the right pressure in just the right places. And then he’ll flip me over, and twist and contort me all over again. Often while still pounding away with fingers and/or penis.
• He manhandles my gspot. To the point that the repetitive motion becomes excruciating for him. But he’ll still keep going. Even after I’ve cum (to get me to the next edge).
• If he sees me drifting from the moment, he’ll bite a toe, press a hand firmly against my throat, hold me down a little firmer, cover my eyes, or tug at my hair.
• About 60-70% of the time, he’ll lick, finger or fuck (less often) my ass. He’ll do it right when I’m about to cum, and push me right over the edge.
• His body becomes an athletic force perfectly designed to mount, pound, and tactfully grind my own. And he does it with a confident, loving smile.
• He always waits for me to cum. Sometimes he waits so long that by the time he cums, he’ll squirt all over my torso, face, the bed and walls. And then we laugh and touch foreheads euphorically.

H is not a very dominant person. He is confident at work (see my post concall sex post) and adoringly dominant in bed. He leaves me to worry about what’s in my head, while he pulls, manoeuvres, pounds, and kisses, me perseveringly till the end. Usually, its seeing how much he’s enjoying it that takes me over the edge.

I have a recent fantasy, where I am naked, on all fours, on a rotating block/pedestal. There are many men (ok and last night there were women, too) in the room. They blindfold me, and take turns fucking and playing with me. I’m not allowed to cum until it is H’s turn, and the second he enters me, I know its him, I can feel it as he leans down to knowingly kiss my neck as he enters me from behind. I cum instantly.

Big Dicks Don’t Try Hard?

2010-08-12T06:13:00.000-07:00

Ever heard that guys with smaller dicks make better lovers? Well, H is hardly small (above average, from what I read/see etc) but T is definitely far above average. I realise that comparing a lover of over 11 years to a lover of two weeks is wholly unfair, but anyway…

This weekend was the last weekend with H away and it was another party weekend. A female friend of ours kissed me. She is hot and fun and it was awesome, until her boyfriend flipped. My bad. I went to the bathroom and she knocked on the door, I let her in, we were chatting, she said she wants to kiss me, we kissed… and then kissed some more… and then some more. Her boyfriend came to find her and lost it completely. I guess I need to learn to remember that not everyone is poly, and to some people even a drunken girlfriends kiss is a big deal.

The night wasn’t ruined – we kept partying and dancing up a storm until every last place had kicked us out, and T and two other friends, lets call them B and Z, came round to our place.

Z is straight-edge, 100% pure vanilla. B is the guy from number 6 on my 25thingsaboutmysexuality post. He had again apologised to me for what had happened years ago (he always apologises when he’s been drinking), but this time he got past that and started telling me that he is still “in love” with me … it was awkward, the feelings are not reciprocal. He tried to kiss me, kept going to lie in my bed (which I rather preferred the idea of it being reserved for T) and all in all was a bit of a mess. At some point, T decided the only way the two of us would get a chance alone that night would be if everyone went to bed, so he went to the spare room to “sleep”. I snuck away from B and Z a few times, to steal kisses with T. He was warm and snugly. He worried that his breath was bad, so I kissed him … long and deep.

Eventually we got B to sleep and Z left. T joined me in my room and we fucked. Again, I was on top. In an attempt to switch it up I turned around (reverse cowgirl style), but he lost his erection… so I flipped over and cuddled and caressed and gave him a short blow job and then got back on (facing forward). Like last weekend, it was fun and relaxed and felt pretty relaxed, though I must say by now I was already starting to wonder if this guy has any tricks other than lie on his back and get fucked.

We fell asleep naked together, which was nice – I had missed having a companion in my bed while H had been away. At some point we had groggy mid-sleep sex – spooning, he fucked me from behind. It felt really good to have his thick cock in me in this position with my legs quite tight together.

In the morning, we were lying down cuddling and I could feel him getting hard, so I went down on him for a while. He seemed to be enjoying it, though I’m not used to giving head to a penis of his proportions. And then we fucked me-on-top again. I was being a bit loud and T had to keep reminding me to be quiet as B was presumably still around. Physically, having T inside of me feels really good. Emotionally, he is a beloved friend and I trust and adore him and feel that when we are together. But there’s still something really missing… perhaps practice. Perhaps foreplay ;-P .

H is far more dominant in bed, so I’m not really used to being the “top”… perhaps I need to learn more about “topping”… but I’d also be scared to totally surprise T with something quite dominant without being sure that that’s what he really wants. I had tried to talk to him about what he enjoys earlier, but he’d clammed up. Funny that, the guy who is generally the one making crude and boastful comments about sex can’t say “I want you to fuck me like [insert desire]”.

The morning after H got back, we fucked. And he fucked me properly. He went down on me, manhandled my gspot, stuck his cock in my mouth, turned me around into numerous different positions while he pounded me. He did it again last night – eventually flipping me around, wrapping my hair around his hand and tactfully tugging me back into the realm of physical sensation.

I found myself falling asleep pondering a few things. I enjoyed sex with both T and H, even though they are both vastly different. Even though I do find T sexy, and a good friend for whom I have deep affection, I am somewhat disappointed with the sex. I am surprised – he’s the “experienced”, “sexually driven” one. Perhaps it would just take more time with him… but he didn’t really seem interested in that. Very much a “fuck-me-till-I-come” approach (and let’s just say, fun as that is with his filling cock, he’s not exactly an energiser bunny either). I would like to get some practice and get a bit better at being a “top”, perhaps it would be much better then!

With H, sex is far more passionate, far more rough, far more enduring… and yes, far more pleasurable. I guess that’s appropriate though, he is my husband and primary sexual partner!

I find myself concluding that I enjoyed having sex with a friend, and am looking forward to encountering other people over the years for whom my affections grow and with whom I’ll get to experience some fun (even if it is just a kiss, hopefully without boyfriends who flip out!) I still have feelings toward T, and would still fuck him if the opportunity arises (almost out of a curiosity to double-check that what I experienced of him is really it, but yes also out of continued affection for him). But T has been taken off any kind of sexual pedestal he may have previously occupied.

I have probably been taken off any kind of pedestal he may have held me to, too – as I was rather new to topping and surprised by the stark contrast in business-time-behaviour between him and H…. I realise this reads quite critically and who am I to judge him – my performance was most definitely sub-par, too.
And H… well, H is gonna get a surprise when I get home this evening…. Grrr!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oh, and as for the girl… well, she’s hot and fun… and … wants to kiss me! Eeek, so yeah she’s occupying some… thoughts ;-). I have apologised to her boyfriend, though, as I realise it was wrong. I didn’t know the boundaries of their relationship, and should perhaps have known better. I also need to look into my double-standard here – I would never kiss a guy who has a girlfriend (without her consent), so why was it ok to kiss a girl who had a boyfriend? Well, it wasn’t ok. Lesson learnt!

T and I - an account

2010-08-04T05:44:00.000-07:00

So, if you’ve read the 25 Things about My Sexuality post, you’ll know that I’ve only had sex with three men, two of whom were not exactly positive sexual experiences. This past weekend, that changed! H is away for work at the moment, and he agreed that the guy from this (M in this one), this, this and this story and I could have some fun during this time. (Also the friend that inspired this post)

On Saturday we got together just past lunch time and started drinking. We drank a lot. I had mailed him during the week to say some things about our friendship and that he should talk to me about any concerns/feelings he might have about sleeping with one of his best friends, who is one of his even better friends’ wife. At some point in the afternoon, he said “lets have that chat”… it didn’t last very long before we stole a very quick, very sweet kiss that made me smile, widely.

We continued to drink quite a lot, and went with a group of friends to a local club. I was too drunk. My bad. Falling-all-over-drunk. T was a great gentleman, picked me up when I fell over, got a cab, and took me home. We stole a few heated (drunken) kisses in between leaving the club and getting the cab. I think I was groping him in a way totally inappropriate for public. I really hope no one saw, my memory of the night is really hazy...

When we got back to his place, there was (again, darn hazy memory) some fooling around – I remember him sucking on my clit, I remember being totally agasp at the size of his cock, and how different the texture of it was to H’s. H has a smaller cock, but a far more beautiful one. H’s cock stands straight, rock hard and smooth. T’s is longer, fatter but squidgier. If that makes sense. His balls also hang quite loosely, and were not trimmed (yes these are the drunken girl’s thoughts when he stripped down!). Again… all a bit hazy. I have a vague recollection of him saying something along the lines of “omg how will I stop fucking you when H is back?”, and hearing that turned me on. I know I was feeling happy, having a lot of fun, and totally comfortable even though the lights were on (bright) and this is the first time T’s ever seen me naked… at some point, we both passed out.

When we woke in the morning, T was ready to go. . It was quite difficult to get his thick cock inside of me, but with the aid of lube and some manoeuvring it slid in and then o-my-god-that-feels-good. I had worried that I was going to be nervous with T, and over-try sexiness. In reality, I felt very comfortable and normal and just did what felt good. I rode him until I couldn’t anymore, and asked him to fuck me from behind, which he duly obliged.

We lay in bed chatting and joking, like friends, for a while until he was ready to go again. He quite shyly whispered (surprising, as he is quite the outspoken pervert outside of the bedroom) “I want you on top of me again”. I felt empowered. For the second time that morning, I fucked him until my legs burnt and we finished missionary style.

There was some pinning down, and there was some biting (both done my me). I don’t know why I bite. I have often found in the heat of the moment I'll bite (gently) H’s neck/chest area. He tells me to stop, he finds it distracting and uncomfortable. I'm worried T was too shy to say anything to me to make me stop… who knows, I’ll have to ask him sometime!

Overall, it was a very fulfilling experience. The sex was pretty vanilla, but it felt really good physically and emotionally. I felt very natural and calm with T. We also had a good laugh because I lost an earring at some point (he has since found it, I am glad as it was a nice one) and we chuckled about that (our friends, including T’s roommate who was away that night, shouldn’t really know as they may not understand the dynamic of a loving wife fucking her husband’s good friend).

So, reality was different to fantasy. But I’m so glad I did it, and would be keen to do it again. But first, I need H to get home already so I can spend an entire day ravaging his beautiful cock!

people fucking

2010-07-29T04:59:00.001-07:00

Hot, cold and wet

2010-07-19T08:47:00.000-07:00

T and I been flirting for a while and had finally let in to these desires in a frantic one night affair. Since then, things were less electric between us, and more down to the casual, relaxed and loving friendship we had always enjoyed. H was aware of the prior electricity and somewhat relieved that we seemed to have gotten it out of our system.

We were going for a picnic for a friend’s birthday – H and I set off fairly early and got to the mountainous spot ahead of everyone else. We opened some drinks and found a sunny spot to sit, chatting about the scenery, which was new to us. We were fairly high up in the mountain, but now on a flat plain with a large dam surrounded by smaller ponds. The terrain was mostly rocky, but with sandy, sheltered pits in between. It was winter still, but the sun was warm and I was soon sitting on a rock in my bikini top and shorts. The spot was quiet and I decided to take a refreshing swim in the large icy pond. By body felt cool and fresh, and my nipples stood straight and hard from the cold of the water. H noticed and grinned, jokingly saying “Nom!” and whacking his lips.

Soon after my swim some others arrived, including T. He seemed distracted, as he often does, and it took a while before I was able to catch his attention and say “hello”. He hugged me and whispered “nice nips” and laughed as he pulled away. I giggled and took a sip of my drink. H squeezed my bottom and motioned for us to go sit where others were setting up a good picnic.

We spent a while chatting, drinking, laughing… as we had more drinks, T became more flirtatious – holding glances at me for longer, and joking with H about what they’d each give to turn this picnic into an orgy.

As it got later in the day, the sun went down and the temperature dropped. My bikini was still wet from taking quick dips throughout the day and my nipples were aching from being hard most of the day. I decided to take my wet bikini off to help warm up, so I moved behind a larger rock to get changed. Behind the rock, I saw a stunning, shallow pond and decided to take one last dip before I would towel myself down and get dressed. I slipped quietly into the water and enjoyed the cool refreshing water move gently between my thighs as I moved my body slowly around the pond. The relaxing day in the sun had left me feeling slightly aroused and I felt a sticky moistness between my legs that contrasted with the cold water.

I got out the water and turned to face the large rock, removing my bikini top and starting to rub my towel over my shoulders and chest. Suddenly, I felt a finger running up the inner of my thigh, and a thumb finding the crease of by bottom just under my bikini bottom. As the hand grabbed my ass, one finger sneaking gently over my wet hole, I turned to see it was not H, but T.

Cold water was still running down my stomach, and goose bumps were slowly forming. I held the towel in front of my naked chest, and watched as T’s large hands caressed by body, moving my legs slightly apart as he moved toward me, pressing his hardon against me, my wet bikini moistening his shorts.
“Not here”, I sigh. “There are too many people”.

My red cheeks give away how aroused I’d become as I reluctantly and quickly get dressed – throwing a top over my naked breasts and pulling some pants on.

I feel noticeably flustered and hope no one catches on, T not helping as we return to the group, him playfully pinching my bum “ag please can’t we just go for a quicky, I want last long, I promise” he laughed.

Before long everyone had decided it is getting to cold we should find somewhere warmer to continue. H and I end up having to give a few people a lift and resulting in T and I sitting next to each other in the backseat- he is against the window and I am squished between him and another couple. He is tall and, with not much room, I lean against his chest as H drives the car down the bendy pass.

As we drove, T’s arm wondered …I sighed as his hands found my hip bone and his fingers teased the elastic of my pants. The desire to fuck him again growing fast, I move slightly and start rubbing his groin gently, using my towel to cover us up a bit. H notices through the rearview mirror but manages to keep his calm. When we arrive at the friend’s house and get out the car, he holds me and says “hey, what were you two doing back there?”

“Getting me ready for later” I whispered in his ear, to which H responded with a reassuring bum-pinch.

The fondling in the car had gotten me really excited – the prospect that the others might figure out what we were up, combined with H being right there, and T’s skilled teasing had been perfectly combined with the hazy, horny daze I was in as a result of the warm afternoon fun. I decided to go straight to the bathroom to freshen up and try to regain composure.

T, however, had different plans and followed me. By the time we were at the bathroom door, he was embracing me – our hands wondering frantically under each others’ shirts and tugging on one another’s pants as we pushed backward into the large bathroom. T pushes me down onto the edge of the bathtub and kneels in front of me, ripping my bikini bottom down and licking my throbbing hot sex. Sticking a finger deep inside of me as I groan, he raises himself up, pulls his pants off his hips and sticks his cock in front of me. Taking his large erect penis first in my hands and then deep into my moist mouth, as I rub my clit and ride the edge of the bathroom tub, I hear the door click and see H stick his head in the door.

“uh…”

But before he can anything more, I groan and tell him “make yourself useful and get your cock in my pussy” and then get back to taking T deep into my mouth, my body squirming with excitement.
T’s large hands caress my shoulders, neck and breasts as he rocks his hips enjoying me sucking on him, while H moves to my side and starts rubbing my stomach and kissing my breasts. My nipples are hard again and this time my goose bumps are in response to the four manly hands running all over my body except the one, sweet, wet spot that wants them the most.

H moves slowly down and turns me so that he can sit under neat me. Rubbing my wet cunt he lifts me up and lowers me by my waist, gliding his cock straight into me as my bum reaches his thighs.

T still stands in front of me, as I lap up his juicy cock and nibble on his balls. I close my legs and then cross them, making my pussy tight around H’s cock as he nibbles my ear from behind and rubs my breasts. I move one hand down into the soft crease created by my tightly wrapped thighs and rub gently around my clit as T groans and squirts his warm juice into my face. As it runs down my face, he lowers himself and sits in front of H and I, still fucking on the edge of the bathtub. T moves my hand away from my clit and rubs it with his thumb, slowly moving u, breathing in the H and mines’ sex, he comes to start licking my swollen love button. As T’s tongue touches me, my legs squeeze tighter together as my body convulses with electric waves pumping around H’s cock, as he gives his final hard thrusts and fills me with warm liquid that oozes out and mixes with my own juices as we all flop to the floor in a heaving mass.

fuck buddy

2010-07-18T10:10:00.001-07:00

I get home and he’s already there. We’d arranged that he would fetch me en route to town. I’d been for a drink after work and hadn’t managed to get home as early as intended. We go inside, me hurriedly apologising and saying I just want to get changed. I’m wearing heals for a change, with stockings with a seam up the length of the back and my black wrap-around dress. My heels click on the wooden floor as I rush around and the cotton dress clings and sways as my body twists around the entrance to the bedroom.

He politely waits outside but speaks to me, telling me everything is cool, I can take my time. I stick my head out and say “thanks”, smiling and making eye contact for this first time since I’d arrived. Our eyes locked – instantly back into a flirtatious, lustful hold. One that had been becoming increasingly familiar.

I giggle and look down and he lets out a sigh. I’m already aroused and nervous of letting it show too obviously.

I get changed – replacing the dress for a top and skirt. As I walk out he comments that he’s glad I’m sticking to a skirt. I laugh, look at him, and softly say “all the better for you to bend me over and fuck me in”.
I couldn’t believe I’d just said that, but I had and he’d heard it. He laughed but stood still and said nothing, playing with his keys with both hands in front of him, and staring right at me – our eyes once again locked intently. By now, my pussy was hot and wet. My breath, shortened and desperate.

I smile as he walks closer, eyes still locked saying “shall we go?” but walking straight into me. I lean in to meet him as we kiss and he presses me hard against the door frame of the entrance to my room. I exhale as my body loosens - months of sexual tension finally released – his body grinding strongly against mine.
We pull away at the same time, saying we’d better get going. I grab my coat and bag and lock up behind us as we go. We meet all our friends and enjoy a few drinks at a local pub. Most of the time, we are sitting across from each other, careful not to look to frequently at each other lest we get caught in a lustful communiqué. A few times, we go to the bar together and stand close, our arms brushing against each other and our fingers gently playing with each other. I hug others to find the excuse to embrace him, and hope that nobody notices when we hold onto each other for a little longer, feeling our bodies pressed tightly against one another.

At some stage we end up alone on the balcony – the last of the smokers. Standing closely to one another, our eyes are darting to and from one another. I hold a look, smile and lean up to meet him as we embrace. Nervous that we could get seen, but feeling overpowered by my own excitement, I press my hips inward against his groin and then pull back rapidly, taking a step away.

My cheeks are glowing hot, a sign of how aroused I’m feeling. He suggests we “pull a ninja” and we quickly leave, excitement growing as we move toward the car. We drive home making small talk about the evening, both aware of what is coming. I can see a slight erection in his pants as I rest my hand casually on his knee.
I walk upstairs ahead of him. He teasingly reaches up, sliding his hand up my skirt and gently squeezes my bum. I groan in response to his touch so close to my swollen wet pussy.

He grabs me, pulls me and kisses me deeply as we move into his room. I push him gently and straddle him on the edge of his bed. Grinding my self against his now hard cock I lift my shirt off, exposing naked breasts – my nipples hard, my body squirming for his.

He pushes me over - flopping me face down onto the bed. In a single motion he lifts my skirt up with one hand and slides around the edge of my panties sticking two fingers straight into my soaked hole. I gasp and groan as he taps his fingers around my swollen cunt, my muscles contracting tightly around his digits. His other hand now pressing down on my back, I reach below and rub my clit humping his hand out of lustful desire.
Getting out of breath, we laugh and he runs to get some wine. We sip and joke a bit, feeling comforted by how relaxed and safe we felt. We kiss some more and I remove my skirt and panties, as well as his shirt and pants. Through his underwear, I rub his cock until I can’t resist it any longer and move down, taking his underwear off and drawing his cock fully into my mouth, holding it for a while and then moving into a motion of sucking and licking. Moaning with enjoyment, I shift to position my pussy in front of him – I rub my clit as he finds me again with his fingers, moving in to lick me every now and then. I suck him and feel his body writhing as we hold back the explosive pleasure running through both of our bodies.

He lifts himself up and pulls me down and then up onto his hard cock as he kneels. Slowly at first, and then moving faster and deeper, my pussy burns with excitement as he thrusts inward and out, holding a hand firmly down on me, rubbing my clit with his thumb. I can feel my body preparing for an orgasm – my feet tightening, my chest heating up… my pussy convulsing in long, deep satisfying contractions I laugh - elated, euphoric. He keeps fucking me for three or four more deep thrusts and as I start coming for a second time pulls out and squirts his hot thick juice all over my stomach and pussy, my fingers rubbing it around my clit as my body jumps with the last of my own contractions.

We flop down, our legs intertwined and my body curving into hiss, and giggle – we look at each other with relief that a few months of lusting had lead to a not at all disappointing experience… We sit naked, drinking and smoking and talking shit until at some stage we fall asleep.

25 things about my sexuality - cool blog, here's my 25 things

2010-07-07T07:17:00.000-07:00

25thingsaboutmysexuality is a great blog I stumbled on - readers sumbit a list of 25 things about their sexuality. Its great fun to read - reassuring, at times saddening, humorous... honest

I wrote my own 25 things, have submitted them to the site and am repeating them here:

1. I know I want to write this, but I don’t know where to start. I think that’s pretty much my approach to sex – I know what I want, but don’t know how to go about getting it , and why I am trying to learn to be less timid.

2.    I’m very open minded sexually. I am willing to try most things, and am keen to push the boundaries (my own). Even if the boundary seems far away from where I am now, I’ll move slowly toward it, breaking through each interim boundary until I’m ready to bash through the final one. And then find another. My only rule with regards to sex is consent. As long as there’s consent, the act is good. Pleasure is good.

3.    I don’t know where I got #2 from. My parents hardly ever spoke to me about sex. My mom talked about my dad’s sexuality/sex drive as if it were a burden, a disease, something that disgusted her. She even told me that I was conceived at one of these time – when he’d wanted to “screw” and she’d resisted, and how she’d hoped she hadn’t conceived that night as it was terrible for a baby to made when a husband rapes his wife. She’d make sure we knew she thought things like swingers and group sex were signs of a weak relationship. But she kept porn, and to this day does not know I know about her porn collection.

4.    My husband is my favourite person. He and I have been together since we were very young. Initially, I wanted to move faster than he did. I always wanted to go to the “next base” before he did. The first time we had sex, we were both incredibly horny. We were at a friend’s house, for a party, in her bedroom. We couldn’t help ourselves. We fucked without a condom and it was amazing. It felt so good to have his penis inside me. Before that, I’d had “intercourse” twice. But I hadn’t wanted to. It was a peer-pressure thing. I’d lain there dead still, dead quiet, like a pap doll until he was done. I’d hated it. It hurt. I wanted it to stop but was mute. My friends had joked about how he’d complained that I just lay there. To this day I a worry that they think I’m terrible in bed. Luckily, my husband knows I’m not ;-)

5.    I always noticed pretty women. When I was 14 I had a huge crush on Angelina Jolie. I have always found it much easier to get along with boys/men than with girls/women. It took my till I was 25 to properly realize I am bi-sexual. I guess having had a partner since I was 13/14 I’d never really needed to think about it that much. I had a partner and always found I was not really attracted to anyone else – male or female. I’d notice they were good looking, but seldom fantasise about anyone else. Somewhere this all changed – we started investigating polyamory and I realized I am fully bi-sexual. I still can’t remember what event triggered the start of the investigation into polyamory. Its working quite well so far – we talk about sex and commitment and jealousy and emotions and all sorts a lot more openly now, and we’ve thoroughly enjoyed our “encounters” thus far.

6.    When I was 17 a best friend of my husband and mines (who we’d done everything with – holidays, parties, the 3 of us were inseparable), started making moves on me. Every time we had alcohol he’d try and kiss me, and tell me he loved me. It got worse and worse until, when I was 19, we went away for the weekend. My husband did not come with as he was away at a LAN. We got stupidly drunk and it was very very cold. I was in my tent and he called me from his to come share to keep warm. I went. There were 4 of us in the tent and he started groping me. Once again I found myself frozen, dead still, like a doll. He pulled my pants down, went down on me for a very short while, stuck his dick half an inch in and then pulled out and came on my stomache immediately. That was the first and only time in my life that I’d had a smelly infection, and I still worry today that he thinks my pussy stinks (I can’t believe he even went down on me), and that I’m a dead doll in bed. I left as soon as the sun came up, fetched my husband and told him what happened. He blamed me and I blamed myself, even though I knew I didn’t want any of it. I saw a therapist for a year. I cried everytime to the very last session. We stopped being friends for a long time, but now we are becoming good friends again. He has apologized to both of us, and I am ok with that, at long long last.

7.    25 seems to be a big year for me. I started my own sex-blog and love writing posts for it, had my first threesome, first proper girl-on-girl experience, I got a naughty piercing a month before my 25th, and many other sexual confidence & -experience mile-stones reached. Most importantly, I think it’s the first year of my life where I have a positive body-image. From 13-20 I was relatively severely bulimic. My husband would literally hold me down to stop me from going to the bathroom after meals. It was only really due to living with him that the bulimia stopped, but I still had the self-hating thoughts. Somehow, I have reached a point of liking my body. I love my small tits, something I always loathed. Now I actually think my body shape is amongst my favourite for a woman. I can’t wait to see what comes when I’m 26.

8.    My husband has a thing for pee. At first I freaked, then realized I was more hurt cos he hadn’t shared it with me (why was I not approachable?), then realized he was ready to approach anyone and that’s why, and then started (slowly) pushing my own boundaries in this regard and am now looking to fun years ahead of experimenting with piss-play.

9.    I like public nudity / exhibitionism in general. I think 26 will be the age I finally tan topless on general non-nudist beaches…. And do other stuff (without getting caught)

10.    I like anal sex and thumbs and toys and stuff up my bum. I love double penetration. I’m not ashamed of that, I don’t see what the big deal with anal is.

11.    When I was young, I had a haunting experience with a girl. I wrote about it on my blog, and regurgitate here: When I was about 7, I was "playing" at a friend’s house after school. In her room, we played "house house"... but more like "couple couple" - we were a "married couple" going about couple-like things. I can't remember all the details... I know I wasn't very happy with the game, and wanted to stay on the floor, but she wanted to move into the bed to "cuddle". When we got on the bed, she said we must get under the blankets and take our clothes off. Again, I can remember feeling uneasy, but also wanting to impress (she was a much prettier girl and I was a shy, introverted child... I was definitely consciously using her to try be more popular and make more friends). We were under the blankets, I had my panties on, but she was completely naked. We were "cuddling"... and I was hot, and felt "funny down there". We were interrupted by our mothers, who freaked out, I was yanked home and sent to my room. Much later in the evening my mom and came in and nervously, but slightly angrily, asked me if there were any "bad things" happening to me that I needed to tell her. I said there weren't any, the truth. She then got very angry and told me to never ever do what I had done this afternoon again. (Side bar: psychologists going crazy with theories about the girl, about my mom, and about my bi-curiosity, they are obvious theories, let’s move on...)

12.    I hardly ever masturbate. But I think this is because I have been with my husband for so long, and he has always been around to service my needs when I am horny. I wonder why some girls claim they don’t masturbate. I mean, I know there is a societal stigma etc…. but really, why deny that you are a functioning sexual being? Claiming you don’t masturbate when you’re single is like admitting to the world that you’re sexually dysfunctional and somehow proud of it. Isn’t sexual health part of “health and wellbeing?”

13.    Even though I love to read, write and talk about sex, I have never spoken about sex with my sister. The thought of that freaks me out. I’m scared we’d be too similar in our turn ons, or not similar at all. I don’t know why that scares me, but it does. I know she enjoys sex, like me, cos her husband makes that clear ;-P

14.    I wish you could buy vibrators in the grocery store. Next to the condoms and lube. I know you can get the disposable vibrating cock rings, so maybe that’s a step in the right (sex positive) direction.

15.    I like anal and pee and being tied up. This does not mean I like degradation. In fact, it’s the worst idea imaginable for me. I would hate to be called names or slapped and spat on during sex. I write this so that people know that things like rope-play can be done in a mutually-reinforcing way, and its not always about a BDSM or rape-fantasy scenario. I like the ropes cos I am forced to not worry about moving or being active. Physically, I can be completely passive, and let my mind do all the work. And I’m not thinking about being an unwilling participant, ever. But that’s still ok for those who do…

16.    People who know me think I only ever wear flat shoes. I have a secret cupboard full of high-heals. I think they’re sexy. I like to take pictures in them.

17.    I’m not one who enjoys sex when I have my period. I like to give my husband lots of blow-jobs at that time. I have quite a thing for cock-sucking, but he is generally a giver in bed, so these are the few days where his cock is mine and he can’t let his hands/tongue/cock go wondering with the aim of giving me pleasure. It gets me really wet to give him blowjobs from flaccid to orgasm.

18.    I think that sexual encounters are way better with people who one actually loves. By love, however, I don’t mean commitment, I mean love. I believe a person can love numerous people at the same time, without having to love any one of them less as a result. I believe that sexual interaction is a very positive and natural expression of love for another.

19.    When I was 13 I was sexually promiscuous. I handed out hand jobs and even a few blowjobs fairly easily. I once asked a boy if I could give him a blowjob and he declined and spread stories about me being a slut. I was quite open with my activities, though, so I don’t think it was news to anyone. It hurt me that people called me a slut, so, even though I actually quite enjoyed the encounters, I’d make out as if I had been drunk/high and regretted it.

20.    I love someone going down on me, but it is easier for me to come if I have someone close to me – lying close to my chest, face, neck – breathing, touching, kissing as I near climax.

21.    Another good way for me to come is the reverse cowgirl. Vibrator on clit, penis in vagina, fingers playing with bum and hearing him loving it…. Very close to instant climax

22.    I respond very well to smells and tastes. A healthy, hygienic natural smell and taste is great. Vanilla or something sweet on a woman and Axe Adrenalin on a man is amazing. The latter is my husband’s deodorant and has been since we met. Before we lived together, if he left a tshirt at my place, I’d sleep with it to smell him next to me. Now if I smell it, I feel at home, so happy and content. A plant based diet makes the best tasting men and women, so yes, your diet is important in determining what I will do with you.

23.    I like going to strip clubs and watching porn. I worry that some of the girls are exploited, but how does one tell which ones. I do not believe that all porn, prostitution and stripping is necessarily exploitation or anti-feminist. This is a moral dilemma for me.

24.    I think there is a double standard (amongst many) in which married men often complain about their unsatisfactory sex lives, how they want their wives to open up, be more explorative, share their fantasies and desires etc, but these self-same men hide their kinks, fantasies and desires from their wives. Often, both are living secret sexualities and complaining that the other doesn’t open up about it. It does worry me, though, that for many of these men they cannot open up to their wives as these women believe anything slightly deviant- even just looking at porn- is some sort of illness. It is a great concern to me that many fetishes are classified disorders in the DSM-IV. See my point 2 – as long as there is consent, I don’t see how pleasure can be “wrong”. (I realize that things that become all-consuming to the point of ruining functioning in other aspects of life could benefit from some sort of help, but a specific desire or act in and of itself should not be classified as a mental disorder).

25.    Right now, I’d really love to have an orgy. Even just a masturbation party would be good.

tension. release.

2010-06-17T00:18:00.000-07:00

Sexual tension is a Powerful thing. One minute I can't imagine you sexually, then something happens (what?) and I'm interested... you're interested... now we want each other, any time, no holes barred ;-) That feeling when you're body is dictating your actions - physical desire overwhelms rationality and behaviour changes - morphing into an animal "on heat".

Then one day we get to release it. A Powerful release. I'm not afraid to make the first move, I straddle you and press my body against yours, you respond with surprise but unhestant to participate. He looks on us, curious at his own lack of emotion. Edges forward to stroke the small of my back as I raise my top over, leaning my small breasts and hard nipples closer to you. He pats my bottom, with encouragement.

You wrap you arms around me kissing me, as I ride you, sliding down until I can unwrap you - find you, take you in and feel you grow harder in my mouth. She joins next to you, leaning in for a kiss as I take you deeper, tongue swirling, my fingers finding gliding around my own wet pussy. You kiss her, she moans as he rubs her small breasts from behind and slowly moves himself down to be behind me, surprising me with his hard cock stuck deeply, knowingly, into my warm, wet cunt.

She joins me at your cock, the two of us kiss - our cheeks glowing hot, our breath warm as we make out inches from you. We suck on the tip and make our way up, and down, rubbing our bodies against each other, all the while he is fucking me from behind.

............. to be continued...........

Non-Monogamy

2010-06-13T05:15:00.000-07:00

I found an interesting info graphic here (shown below). It's nice to know people are thinking about this and generating nice visualizations and good books like this one.

Lick me up and down

2010-06-11T01:54:00.000-07:00

eyes. always locking. we know what we are saying - i want to fuck you right now. i imagine us losing control, giving into our desires. i imagine you pressing yourself hard against me, your erect penis unashamedly pushing my hip bone. i'll straddle you, let you lick my nipples as i lift my top over my head. with a deep breaths, we'll grind... my pussy dripping and you grinning as your fingers find my wet spot.we'd fuck frantically until we are both spent, rest and then start again.

i'd like it if he liked you, too, then we could have a "threepover" ;-). i'd take you both out back and sit you down next too each other, facing the shower, cinema style. i'd let the water run down my body, my nipples erect, my hands wondering... when the urge strikes, i'd squatt, facing you, and let you see the golden spray shoot out from below the piercing's shiny jewel - forward, up and down, trickling with the shower water passed my bare feet... i'd let you each take me - a cock taken deep into my mouth, and another ramming forcefully from behind...

and when we're done, you will leave and he will tie me down, face down, lick me all over and as my body squirms in a deep orgasm, he'll stick his dick deep inside, hard and fast, reclaiming me.

Holy crap more than a month went by

2010-06-10T04:36:00.000-07:00

So time ran away ... we have enjoyed a few more "threepovers" and getting to be less timid :-)

We have moved into a new home with great love-nest potential :-)

We are in South Africa where it is the World Cup, so here's a pic in that spirit:

Learning to be less timid

2010-04-30T07:49:00.000-07:00

We had our first 3some with a wonderful, super sexy woman recently. It was .... in a word... hot. I thought I'd be very nervous and hesitant. I was worried about jealousy or freaking out.

In reality, I was so into it all -- into her: her breasts, nipples, her tummy, hair, neck, mouth. Her pussy. Watching him enjoy her, enjoy me, enjoying each other was an amazing turn on. It felt natural, relaxed....grrrrrrrrrrrrr.

I keep having flashbacks to these incredibly hot moments... and get all flustered - its like a very lusty infatuation.

We saw her again and I was ... I'm not sure what. I didn't feel unsure in anyway - I knew I'd enjoyed the first time, I knew I wanted it again. But I couldn't bring myself to actually do anything. Anything I thought of saying/doing seemed so lame and in over analysing moments of opportunity were missed.

Making out the second time, when it did happen, was just as amazing as the first.... I left feeling very turned on.

I think, next time, I'll just break the ice with a kiss right upfront. Here's hoping. ;-P

Its been a while

2010-04-16T07:20:00.000-07:00

Its been a while since I posted... life's been busy.

That said, there's been time for sex! This week we've had sex 6 times already, and we still have the weekend... ;-) I can't wait...

Here's a story to get the juices flowing...

------------------------------------------------------------------------

We'd spent the day picnicking on the mountain, the three of us. We came down, all relaxed and hazy, and had sunset cocktails on the strip. We joked about naughty things.

He was visibly nervous, visibly excited. She was too. I guess, so was I.

We went to see what the water felt like. We walked a while in the shallow waves. Still making naughty jokes.

He was snapping pics, like he often does, getting some good ones in the dusk lighting.

I'd needed to pee for a while, and couldn't really hold it much longer... The cocktails helped me not to care to hold it...

I turned and shouted "Get a pick of my bum while I wee!!" as I lifted my skirt, dropped my panties onto the sand and ran closer to the waves.

"Wait, wait" he didn't want to miss the shot.

I squatted down, my feet sinking into the wet sand, and released. I laughed loudly as my piss formed an arch into the shallow water in front of me.

I looked up from my own piss to see that she was next to me, squatting, her white bum next my own, and giggling as she, too, formed a rounded arch.

He was snapping away behind us. The idea of a picture of our two bottoms as we pissed into the sunset was invigorating... liberating...

Her arm brushed against mine as we both stood up, laughing, and moved back to where he was standing. She put her arm affectionately around me as we leaned in to look at the pics, which we could hardly see in the now very dim light.

We walked back to a group of large boulders and climbed down into a triangular shaped shelter. We sat snuggly and shared some more jokes and stories.

There was a lull.

A look - she looked at me, eyes wide open, eyebrows raised, and grinned widely.

I leaned in, took off her glasses and kissed her gently. He was leaning back against a rock, his legs flat out in front of him, in between us, as we leaned in front of him, kissing at first slowly and then more passionately.

The build up was already there - I had been aroused since much earlier and the kiss affirmed it all - I was warm... tingly... and increasingly wet.

She pulled back, breathed heavily and said "sho!" her cheeks visibly red, even in the dim lighting.

He was quiet, watching.

We leaned back in and continued our kiss and I felt his hand start rubbing my back... and then move slowly around to caress my breast... nipple... through my clothes. She took his hand and placed it gently on her own breast and he let out a soft whimper.

We raised ourselves slightly and kissed more intently... my body swelling with pleasure and the desire for things to go further... she reached around, lifting my skirt slightly and squeezed my soft bum cheek...I rubbed my hand around her belly and tugged on her the waist of her shorts to pull her closer to me.

We paused and I kissed him. The contrast of new vs. familiar, feminine vs. masculine was exhilarating. I wanted him now more than ever, I wanted him inside of me.

I tugged on his pants, unzipped and pulled them down, revealing his large cock. Her hand was teasing the crease of my groin as she moved between bum and thighs and softly glided over my pussy, which was making my panties went by now... I lent down to take him into my mouth, and as I took him in slowly, and my lips reached the base, she rapidly slid a finger deep into me and made a come-hither movement - my hips jutting forward, I groaned with pleasure and sucked hard as I lifted my face up, licking and then taking him in again straight away.

He was lifting her top off now, eager to play with her larger breasts, and leaned forward to take a nipple into his mouth. She giggled and moaned as she wriggled herself out of her shorts.

Still sucking him, I raised my hand and found her belly, moved sideways onto her hip and then followed her shorts as the came down, moving across to her pussy as they did so... she was warm and moist as I circled her clit widely with one finger and then slid it softly into her.

He sat slightly more upright and replaced both her hand and mine, fingering us both and looking up at us as we kissed again.

She moved me forward and bent me over and slowly licked the small of my back, breathing over my bottom and finding my clit with her mouth. She, too, bent over for him to taste her from behind. He did so and groaned, looking up briefly to tell us how hot we both were.

She was licking and fingering me hard and I was rubbing my nipples... the fresh ocean breeze cooling me down, I was relaxed ... the pleasure was surreal. As he licked, sucked and fingered her, I could feel her own body writhing and grinding back and forth as she moaned into my pussy.

She squirmed and moaned and said softly "oh god...oh... I'm coming".

We all giggled a bit, but carried on - she didn't stop licking me and then I heard her say "Oh yeah, fuck me... fuck me hard"

He leaned forward and jokingly slapped my ass... as I pressed gently backwards into her face...

I turned around now, wanting to get the view, and lay on my back. I could see her going down on me, and him fucking her from behind. He smiled and winked and then threw his head back in pleasure.

Her bum made a heart shape against his belly, as he slapped hard and fast into her. She was fingering and licking me vigorously and as I closed my eyes I felt the orgasm build up... she breathed heavily, I could sense her grinning, as my pussy engorged and eventually let go ... "aaah...fuck...aaaaah" I squirmed as I came.

He was looking right down onto us, onto me and smiling, his cheeks bright red. She licked me soflty and slowly until I lifted her up and crawled to reach her clit with my tongue. I licked it as he thrust in and out of her. She moaned softly and breathed heavily as he began to groan "huh huh I'm gonna come" and pulled out and squirted warm cum all over her ass and my face.

Flopping back we all laughed and battled to catch our breath.

"Well... that was.... unexpected"...

;-P

H & Africa Anniversary

2010-03-29T11:50:00.001-07:00

Today is a special day

A long time ago today we kissed (not for the first time) - we'd spent the evening hiding out from our friends lying on the floor next to C's bed... talking, crying with the deep connectivity we both felt... later we all walked to the tennis courts where we kissed. and from then on we have been "exlcusive"

A few days later was the first time H kissed my breasts - we were lying on a matress under the stars, kissing, and you tentatively moved down, you looked at me for a long time, very lovingly, cautiously... I squirmed with excitement as you rubbed and kissed my nipples and breasts. I think people were watching us. Maybe thats where the exhibitionism comes from.

So many years down the line, and I want you even more than ever before. H has been doing some exercise and his stomache is looking so hot! I noticed when you were fucking me the other day... I don't know what I did to be so lucky.

It made me want your cock so badly.

when we were young you used to pleasure me and resisted my touches for quite a while... I'd want to reciprocate the "favour", but you were reluctant... shy, a bit. All I wanted to do was rub and suck, and eventually, fuck your hard cock.

When you became more comfortable, I wanted it even more - I can remember kneeling in front of you, you pressed against your bedroom door, both of us still in school uniform, and me begging you to let me blow you, even "for just a little bit"... you were scared your mom or brother would interrupt... in those moments, I couldn't have cared less, I just wanted YOu. Sometimes I wouldn't get my way. I'd be all hot and bothered until much later when we went to sleep. The worst were the days I'd have to go home -- driving home with red hot cheeks wondering if it was obvious to anyone how wet I was.

It was the same on Sunday -- your cock was all mine, the sensation of almost the whole thing deep in my mouth, my tongue and throat and cheeks frantically fighting over it - wanting it all, all at once... when I felt you come I just kept going... I could have kept going all day - luckily I got another go later on ;-P

Who knew after having you for so many years, I'd want you the most tonight?

Sometimes I want to be passive, othertimes I want to be active

2010-03-17T12:47:00.000-07:00

I have had two particularly great sex experiences in the past few days, but very different ones. H sent me a link to an article he was reading, so I sent him one to the one I was reading - about how to tie knots during rope-play.

He stood up, said “Come. We are going to do this now” and walked me to the room.

I sat there patiently waiting, as I heard him clammer in cupboards around the apartment, and then he walked in with different pieces of rope. He told me to get naked, spread me out flat on the bed, on my back, and proceded to tie my wrists to the bed, and then my ankles.

Spread eagle on the bed, unable to move my arms or legs more than a few centimeters, he blindfolded me with a red scarf.

He tickled me. He made me cum with some toys and skilled touch, and then fucked me.
It was a slightly surreal feeling being so restricted, yet exposed and being coaxed gently toward uninhibited euphoria.
-----------------------------------------------------------
We had some time to kill, and were lazy around. We started making out --- still half clothed, he fingered me while kissing me, in a way that made feel like a teenager again – so slow and hot and horny. And infatuated.

After he made me cum with his fingers, I moved down on him – I moved my mouth up and down, sucking and licking my tongue along his cock. I twirled his rock hard cock up and down in my hand until I felt his body relax and his warm, sweet juice squirt deep into my mouth and throat.

We lay cuddling for a while, but I was still horny. I started playing with his penis again, and watched it trying to grow. I took it in my mouth and sucked hard, moving up and down on it more and more as it grew back. I moved over him into 69 position, told him he didn’t have to do anything, “I just thought you’d enjoy the view”.

“MMmmm” he agreed, rubbing me gently and licking me anyway.

I carried on sucking and licking and twirling his cock, and licking and rubbing his balls, taking him deeper into my mouth on each wet stroke.

Feeling incredibly horny, hot and red and wet, I wanted nothing more than to have his cock in my mouth, to play with.

I moved off of H and knelt next to him, moaning with pleasure as I took him deep into my mouth and caressed his balls.

I reached down with the other hand and felt my wet pussy, groaning as I did so, and sucking and licking H’s amazing smooth and hard cock, filling my mouth and teasing my throat.

I did this for a while, overwhelmed by pleasure, until H’s groanings made me start rubbing myself harder and H’s ever-sweet cum shot right down my throat.

nice pics

2010-03-06T08:05:00.000-08:00

solo (int)eruption

2010-03-06T07:08:00.000-08:00

It was a warm day and she was feeling very relaxed. She had been feely slightly aroused all afternoon and, alone, decided to set herself up to masturbate.

She lay on the cushioned bench in the sunny lounge and beganning rubbing around her lips and over her clit. Her head back and eyes closed, she ran her fingers around and slowly teased herself. growing hotter and wetter, and her clit growing, she turned a small vibrator to her clit, rubbing around the edges and thinking about his touch.

She could feel an orgasm building within her, but felt strangely in control, easing the pace of the very firm rubbing to delay the orgasm. She felt strong contractions pumping in her vagina, with long, heavy intervals. Her chest hot and breathing heavy, she felt high on the power of controlling her "tipping point".

Flopping her head sideways, she noticed that the guys had arrived home, and were casually,cautiously, quitely creeping their way around the room. Ben had already seated himself, his eyes fixed on the movement of her hands, Sam was just now lowering himself to sit near to Ben, Brian was sitting in the opposite corner and H was standing in the doorway, watching her work.

Still engrossed in her heavy, full-bodied orgasm-pending plateaux, she gazed hazily at the men.All of them had hard-ons and none tried to hide it.

Breathing deeply and slowly, she continued to rub her clit, now gliding the vibrator in and out of the entrance to her wet pussy. Slippery wetness covered her hands and left shiny marks on her smooth thighs.

Ben had moved his shorts down and was slowly stroking his hard, dripping cock while staring at her.

The audience was welcome, and she found her legs squirming as the intensity of the pleasure made it harder not to let go...

As a deep, long convulsion spread down from her belly button, waving down through her pussy, H neared her and said "look like you need a hand there".

Her touched his finger to her clit as Sam moved forward and licked her nipple. Her body lay relatively still now as intense contractions followed one after the other, after another...

kisses and breath

2010-03-06T04:03:00.000-08:00

There's not much thats nicer than you lying next to me, kissing me, breathing close to me, nudging me, as I come and come and come and come.....

Funny infomercial

2010-02-27T23:08:00.000-08:00

"Get great arms for handjobs"

lol!

Post concall sex

2010-02-27T09:27:00.000-08:00

I came home to hear his voice coming from the study... he was on a concall. Hearing him speaking confidently and eloquently about, well, some work issues (more specific than that I can't really go, as I don't speak "programmer") got me really hot.

I've always adored his intelligence, and hearing him "at work" turned out to be a new-found aphrodisiac. I wandered around the apartment listening intently, feeling my arousal build and anxiously awaiting the end of the call.

I heard him sign-off and immediately entered the study, going straight in for a kiss. Our lips locked, I started undressing and within seconds my top and bra were on the floor.

Kissing me, he walked me backwards to the bedroom, where I turned him around, took off his pants and starting sucking his already hard cock.

"MMMmmmm", I was writhing and squirming as I took him deep into my mouth.

Pushing me back, hard, onto the bed, he took my pants off and gave me one quick flick with his tongue, then entered me with his cock, thrusting deep and hard.

I grabbed a vibe and pushed it against my clit, H still thrusting deep, and hard. We flipped over, I got on top, my ass facing him, and moved my body up and down, rubbing his dick against my gspot and pressing the vibe hard against my clit... I came almost immediately, but didn't stop...

Still fucking him and now rubbing the vibe gently in circles, I felt his finger rub around my bottom, eventually slipping into my ass, making me convulse with pleasurable contractions once again. My vagina pumped and by body squirmed as he rapidly thrust his hips up and down.

When I finished coming, he very quickly flipped me over. My hot, wet pussy pressed firmly against the bed, my clit knocking against the mattress as he fucked my from behind brought the convulsions back, this time deeper, more powerful and more drawn out...

I felt dizzy and frantic all at the same time and bit down into the bed as he pumped harder and faster until he thrust deep inside and pressed his chest right down against my back, breathing on my neck as he came.

*** I Love my Geek***

Some shots

2010-02-26T10:53:00.000-08:00

Young clerk never knew how good an older woman could be...

2010-02-18T07:00:00.000-08:00

Tom and Sarah worked together in the planning department on the 14th floor. She was his senior, had been at the company for many years and wore a wedding ring. Tom had never thought of her in a sexual way - she was just the lady he went to for sign off and approval.

Sarah had not taken too much notice of Tom in the past, other than noticing the very obvious - he was a young man who was in great shape, had a full head of thick dark hair and a certain cocky confidence that only young, single men elude. She'd watched the younger female clerks woo over him in their tea breaks, and had smiled remembering her own youth.

Lately they had been working long hours together on an important deadline, which Sarah had taken a more involved role in than usual due to the added pressure. They'd found that they worked great as a team - her years of experience providing all the strategic guidance that was needed, his sharpness and creative ideas and questions fueling some new approaches, they understood each others objectives and complimented each other well.

On a few occasions they had ordered lunch and worked behind her closed office door for the entire day, working through files and each hacking away on their laptops. They'd become relatively easy with each other, even to the extent that Sarah removed her sling-back heels whenever it was just the two of them working.

Overtime, Tom had started noticing mannerisms that he enjoyed and felt fond of - they way she twisted the silver chain around her neck while brainstorming, the way she wiggled her toes when listening to him talk, clearly already bursting with a response, the way she religiously grabbed her jacket or scarf when they left her office, covering up for other company.

She, too, had become very fond of him. She respected his hard work and bright mind, and how it seemed to come so easy to him, how he still found room for perfectly placed jokes, and how he always wore a shirt that was *just* tight enough to show off his strong shoulders.

Towards the end of the project they had to meet a client one last time to collect some important files and run over a few details.

The meeting was a great success - the client was blown over by the accurate grasp that they had on his requirements. All the way home, with Sarah driving, the two had been busting with pride, and excitedly chatting about how they would wrap up all the details.

They got into the lift with a few other people, Sarah holding the files tightly against her chest. Tom noticed how tall and straight she stood, her calves strong and firm, tapping her foot in its black sling-back slowly as they moved upward. On the 5th floor, the others exited and Sarah and Tom stood alone in the lift.

There had been silence since they entered, a calm after the excitement they'd shared in the car a few moments earlier. Once they were alone, the silence persisted, the air hot and heavy with a new excitement. Tom leaned slightly closer to Sarah, breathing in the scent of her sweet, fruity perfume.

She could feel him leaning closer, his warm breath slowly meeting the flesh of her neck... It was surprisingly pleasurable, as she closed her eyes and breathed slowly in, feeling the warmth of his body near to hers. The 8 floors they traveled up felt like an eternity.

Still clingy onto the files, she stepped forward as soon as the lift stopped, and the two walked about a meter apart back to her office.

Once inside, she closed the door and put the files on the big round table she used for small private meetings. She poured herself some water and took in a small sip, as Tom stood and watched her, avoiding eye contact.

Sarah sat down and Tom pulled a chair closer to hers, lowering himself slowly into it. They started going over the papers they had just received, Sarah determining the pace by holding onto the stapled corner, and Tom leaning in to read it.

Drawing a line under some text with her finger, Sarah looked up and sad "You know, we had it right -- this is exactly what we'd suspected?" She checked with Tom, his face almost directly in in front of hers now, staring closely at the papers she held.

Tom looked back at her to agree, and realised his face was inches away from hers. Smiling broadly, he said "Indeed. We make a great team", without moving away.

Sarah was feeling the sexual tension and wondered if she was misreading the situation. Cautious, she tested "How about a celebratory drink later on?"

Still not moving, Tom responded "Sounds good, Sarah", and locked his eyes gazing softly into hers.

"Tom, I..uh," she attempted, but he moved forward and kissed her gently, no tongue, but firm with his lips against hers and breathed in deeply as he pulled away, leaving their mouths not more than 2cm away. She immediately moved forward and they embraced in an impassioned kiss, his mouth tasting fresh and sweet.

Tom was a bit astounded with himself, but already had a huge hardon, his body warm with anticipation. He reached an arm around her neck and continued to kiss her, before he lifted her up slightly and pushed her and her chair back from the table.

Tom knelt slowly and moved his face down her neck, breathing warm breath onto Sarah's skin as she sat with her arms on the arm rests and let her head drop backward. He nestled his face into her breasts through her white cotton shirt, and started unbuttoning it.

Tom cupped one her left breast with his hands and gently pulled back her bra, taking her nipple into his mouth. He sucked and kissed it before repeating the same on the other breast, and moving down, not once lifting his face more than an inch from her body.

Sarah could feel the arousal building inside of her, her pussy was swelling and tingling and her nipples hard and erect. She felt his breath through her clothes as he moved down and rested his face in her crotch, while lifting her skirt right up.

She took one hand and slid her fingers through his hair and down his neck to feel the strength of his shoulders under his shirt. Her hand now resting between his shoulder blades, she moaned as he slowly moved her panties to the side and licked one upward stroke along her hooded clit.

"Uh,..huh.." she battled to breath, "wait.... the door!" She managed to get out.

Tom quickly rose to obey and locked the door from the inside.

Sarah met him half way back and told him to sit on the table. He did so and she straddled him, forcing him to lean backward, resting on his elbows. She unbuttoned his shirt revealing a smooth, toned abdomen and took his nipple into her mouth, lingering there for a while, pressing her wet groin, skirt still hitched up, against his hard penis through his pants.

She licked and rubbed his chest and hard stomach as he rested there, his cheeks rosey pink and his eyes glistening with excitement. Sarah undid the buckle of his suit-belt and opened his pants, allowing his penis to rise further, but still slightly restrained by the silk of his boxers.

Sarah rubbed her vagina against his penis, the silk shorts getting wet from her juices and kissed him deeply. Tom sat slightly and used one hand to remove her blouse, nibbling the flesh of her chest and shoulders and coming up to breath in her perfume at her neck.

Sarah turned, positioning herself above Tom so that her pussy was right above his face, and yanked down his shorts and pants to just above his knees, which were dangling at the edge of the table. Hooking her toes on the opposite table edge, she lowered herself and took his cock into her mouth, as he raised his head and licked her once again.

Sarah was slowly moving up and down on his salty penis, while he ravaged her pussy with fingers and tongue. He rubbed hard on her g-spot with two fingers and licked and sucked at her now large clit.

Sarah could feel her body heating and her pussy filling with sexual energy - she wanted all of him all at once - she hesitated from sucking his cock every other stroke to glance at his smooth abdomen, wrinkling slightly as he lifted his head in rhythmic motions.

Tom was amazed by her skill and battled to focus on giving her pleasure, astounded by the sensations of her fingers, palms, lips and tongue on his penis and balls.

He reached down to squeeze his cock, fearful he might come too soon.

"God", he uttered as he dropped his head back. "You'd better leave me for a bit, why don't you turn around?"

Sarah obliged, somewhat reluctantly, and turned so that she faced the wall. Tom stuck his fingers back into and licked rapdily up and down her clit, while she rubbed her mound vigorously up and down in unison.

Sarah could feel herself nearing climax, and Tom could was encouraged by her heavy breathing and the intensity of her own rubbing to go harder and faster. His hands sopping wet, he flicked a thumb back so that it was rubbing her anus while he continued to thrust his fingers in her.

Tom felt her pussy clench tighter against his fingers, but he didn't stop... Sarah exclaimed "I'm coming!!" loudly as her muscles contracted in powerful pumps.

Tom slowed down and couldn't help giggling at her loudness, nervous of having been overheard.

This concern didn't seem to be shared by Sarah, who flipped around moved backward on the slippery table top, immediately taking Tom's dripping, hard penis deep into her vagina and thrusting with the same speed that he had just brought her to climax.

Sarah felt her muscles contract again, this time even more powerful - each contraction starting in her belly and moving slowing into her clit and back out, four, five, six, seven hard contractions like this - her head was flung backward, her exposed neck red and her chest heaving with deep, heavy breaths.

Tom was watching this in amazement, feeling her pussy clenching around his penis in rhythmic contractions, literally drawing his juices out of him as he felt his balls move up and his own orgasm pushing through his penis, which he shoved deep inside of Sarah and held there until the pleasure subsided.

Sarah grabbed the base of his cock and lifted herself slowly off him, licking their combined juices off her fingers as she dropped his penis and flopped sideways, her bare bottom on the large round table.

They stayed there quietly for a few minutes, breathing deeply, not looking at each other, before she reached for a glass of water and he lifted himself back onto his elbows to get a sip from her glass.

"I can't wait to tell my husband about this! He's going to think its so hot!" Sarah said.

Tom looked at her, an eyebrow raised, and wondered how much more he had to learn from this woman!

Sleepy midnight sex

2010-02-17T00:31:00.000-08:00

I went to bed feeling soooo horny last night. H was already half asleep when I shut down my laptop, and he resisted my nudgings... I lay there deciding whether or not to pull out my toys, but must have fallen asleep.

Sometime later I awoke to my own moanings. I was sighing heavily and groaning "mmmmmmmmmmmmm". I was very dazed and confused, as I realised H was rubbing my nipples and touching my side, his erect cock pressed against the small of my back.

Still groggy and half asleep, but feeling very worked up already, I asked him for some water. His reaction was one of confusion. Disoriented, as if my asking him for water had woken him up, he reached around and discovered there was none. He climbed out of bed, shaking himself awake, and I watched as he walked naked to get some water - his cock standing straight out, a stunning silhoette.

He returned to spoon me, kissing my neck and running his fingers along my panty line, caressing my bum. I pulled my panties down, and he reached forward, rubbing my clit and finding my wet hole.

He stuck is cock deep inside me, filling me, as I held a vibrator pressed hard against my clit. His thrusts making me wetter with each movement, I lifted my leg so that each thrust would rub straight against my sensitive g-spot, all the while rubbing the vibe vigorously on my engorged clit.

It was not long before I could feel the muscles of my vagina and abdomen expanding outward... the build up was long, I knew I was past "that point", I was going to come, but it just kept building and building until finally my pussy started contracting, slowly at first and then more rapidly, spreading into my clit and anus, as he held a finger tenderly inside and continued thrusting.

He pulled out, ready to come, as I came a second time, by body convulsing forward and back and my legs clenching tighter together. I turned and pressed my hot sweaty body against his. His hands playing with my clit and hole, I took his penis in my own, and glided it up and down a few short strokes before I felt his hot juice spraying on my breasts, shoulder, arm and, finally, hand.

We kissed, drank some water, and fell back asleep.

.... now all I can think about is sleepy midnight sex!

dog-diggety!

2010-02-15T12:49:00.000-08:00

Jane and Kate had spent the afternoon online looking at porn and visiting sex sites. They'd fooled around intermittedly throughout the afternoon, but were still really riled up. They'd seen an online add for “dogging” in a town further north. It was the second time they’d heard the term since first hearing just ten days earlier.

They’d both really liked the sound of the idea, but were also very nervous of “being caught”.

The two girls dressed up that night, they were both smelling fresh and showing off their gorgeous silky legs. Kate pinched Jane’s bottom as they left the front door and Jane laughed in response, with a naughty wink.

After a few drinks with their friends, the conversation got particularly interesting. Jack mentioned that he’d had a fetish for watching (spying on) girls get changed since he was young. He joked that he often “hides” just outside the bedroom and looks in on his roommate (Anne) while she is changing… Anne didn’t seem to be bothered by this admission, rather laughing loudly. Nervously.

Jane piped in then “have you ever spied on one…. doing more than just changing?

“Like what?”, Jack was captivated.

“…Like, masturbating?”

“NO!” Jack exclaimed.

Then, smiling, “..Not that I would mind”

Anne was beside herself. She tugged on Jack’s shoulder, “You...you haven’t, have you?”

Squirming in her seat, she was giving away more secrets than Jack could/would have.
“Hah!” Jack joked, “now I am definitely going to try!”

“Oh god”, Anne moaned as she buried her face in her hands. Then suddenly “Let’s drink”, as she downed the last few sips of her fruity drink.

A few moments of silence later, Anne proposed, much calmer now “Actually. If you get to watch me, what do I get out of it? It’s only fair that I get to watch you.”

Jack sipped his whiskey and licked his lips lightly, stopping to bite his lower lip lightly, “I’ve never thought about that…”

Jane and Kate had been watching this with keen interest. Kate tested “We have”.

“We have what? Thought about watching me? Or her?” John asked, looking to and fro between Kate and Jane, and Anne (not that any of them would be an unwelcome audience!).

“Both! And some combinations!” Jane giggled.

“Hey, we’re happy to oblige the deal, you know. Be fair and all, you guys get to watch us, too” Kate reasoned naughtily. “We… huh, maybe you get a bit of a show later on...”

“Oh yeah?” teased Anne. “Tell us more”

Kate and Jane turned to each other and grinned, slightly embarrassed, but highly excited by the conversation. They kissed each other, their most tongues only just gently greeting each other, before they pulled away and faced their friends again, sitting much closer together now.

“Well, let’s just say there were a few reasons we drove our own car tonight…”, Jane chirped.

“Ooohooooo!!” Jack loved this.

He now had his arm around Anne, and she wasn’t resisting.

“Why don’t we get out of here. I like where this conversation is going…” Kate nudged the group on.

Everyone was noticeably excited – rosy cheeks and smiles, trying to be stifled with varying degrees of success, abounded.

The four walked down to the car park, Kate and Jane already entangled in a mess of groping arms as they made their way to the car.

Kate rammed Jane up against the car and kissed her, grinding her hot body against Jane’s, their soft legs intertwined. Jane was wet with anticipated and struggled playfully with Kate to get the car keys.

Anna and Jack were seemingly unaware of this game, as they were entangled in their own embrace, Jack pressing his roommate up against the concrete pillar of the parking lot, which had a few groups of people milling to and from vehicles and the strip of restaurants and clubs.

Anna had her hands under Jack’s shirt, pressing her fingers into his flesh, as if testing the tenderness, as he licked her neck. Anne couldn’t believe this was Jack… her roommate who she’d enjoyed the look of very much, but seldom thought of as more than a fun friend.

Jane and Kate made it into the car, and had pushed the passenger seat all the way backward, so that there was maximum “legroom”. Jane sat on the seat, as Kate Straddled her and shut the door.

Kate immediately crawled slowly down Jane, until she was kneeling on the car floor, her face buried up Jane’s skirt. Jane groaned softly as she felt the warm breath through her already wet panties.

Jack and Anne had turned on the pillar such that they could both look at Jane and Kate, through the windscreen and front passenger window. They could see Jane slouched on the car seat, “in the blind spot” for most passersby. They could see her lying there, eyes closed, breathing heavily, fondling her breasts, her top lifted up above them.

Anne was incredibly aroused – the kissing and close physical contact with Jack, and now this, watching her two girl friends in the car - she leaned in to kiss Jack once again, just briefly, and then turned to watch the two girls.

Kate’s head was bopping up and down as she vigorously fingered and licked Jane’s sopping wet pussy. Jane was groaning quite loudly now. Jack and Anne could hear her “ooohh, oh, fuck,….jesss…” as she scrunched up her red face and blurted out “I’m gonna..c….oh,fffffffffc” as her body kicked up violently. Kate lifted herself back, but still rubbed two fingers fast inside her girlfriend’s hole, until Jane subsided and laughed “oh, god, I’m so horny! I can’t believe how horny this makes me!”

“Shhhhh!” Kate instinctively giggled, suddenly fully aware again of their surroundings.

“Oh, love, Kate, you gotta swap places with me”, Jane lifted herself up and sideways for Kate to get onto the seat. Jane then lifted herself so that she was kneeling on the back seat, and lying 69 style over Kate, resting her elbows on the seat on either side of Kate’s slim thighs. She positioned herself so that Kate could see her vagina, and touch it with her hands, but not very comfortably lick it.

That was just what Jane wanted, to be able to focus on pleasing Kate. Kate was so hot – already aroused from the day’s build-up, she had been quick to feel her body grow increasingly warmer, the feeling starting in her groin and expanding outward, as she had brought Jane to cum.

Jane kissed and pecked at her stomache and crotch, teasing Kate.

Anne and Jack watched, Anne pressed tightly against Jack’s body, feeling his erect, hard penis through their clothing. They stood stuck together like that, grinding slowly inward, and outward, as they stared sideways, mesmerized by the view of Kate’s wriggling, writhing body.

Kate was slowly fingering Jane’s pussy, and humping the air with anticipation of Jane’s knowing lick. Jane slowly pulled Kate’s panties down, just enough, and licked Kates’ clit instantly. The teasing was over, and Kate felt herself succumb to pleasure – her belly expanding with warmth and her moist pussy bubbling with excitement.

Jane sucked and flicked Kate’s large clit as the cupped her arms under Kate’s bottom, using both hands to run fingers rapidly up and down Kate’s lips, bringing moisture down on each stroke. Gradually, she began inserting a finger into Kate’s pussy, with rhythmic thrusts, all the while flicking her clit with her tongue. Kate sighed and couldn’t believe she felt almost ready to come!

Jane carried on and slowly added another finger. Before the second finger had done a full thrust, she dipped her pinky into Kate’s tight but wet asshole. “huhuhuhuh….huhu..gsshhhhhhh!” she flapped all over.

Anne and Jack both jumped slightly with surprise and excitement at the sight of Kate squirting a thick line of clear liquid straight up into the air – Jane moving slightly at first, a few sprays almost hitting the windscreen, then moving back in and lapping in Kate’s juices, as Kate mumbled incoherently

Jane and Kate lay there for a while, breathing heavily and giggling softly.
Jack’s hardon was pressed right into Anne’s side now, as she clung to his neck and nibbled on his ear and jaw, then finding his kiss and opening her lips as they locked into a tight, horny kiss.

"Do you still want to see me masturbate?" Anne whispered.

---- to be continued ---

Happy Valentines Day

2010-02-15T06:52:00.000-08:00

We don't do VD (teehee!!)

But we did have our first "proper" kiss on the 13th Feb, many many years ago.

We had been friends for a while, good friends, "best friends". We loved each other deeply. We spoke about getting married, and that awesome house we'd have with the pond entrance and stepping stones (lol... maybe one day still?), we kissed.... pecked, repeatedly... but never "french kissed" ... That would have been "more than just friends" and we didn't want that, we didn't want to ruin our friendship by "getting serious too young".

On the 13th Jan that year (1999), you slept over. We lay next to each other, our warm bodies so close... I was so aroused by the smell of you, the nearness of your breath. We kissed and said goodnight... about a hundred times... each time lingering that little bit longer... our soft lips touching. Both of us gently, ever so hesitantly, opening our mouths slightly to let out some breath, and moisture... we did this for hours... I wanted you so badly right then.

This kind of thing happened when we saw each other...we called these our "secret kisses". And then on the 13th Feb, I visited you at your house... a pretty normal way to spend a Saturday together, we were chilling on your bed in your room.

We kissed ("as friends"), but we both knew we wanted more.

You pressed your body so hard against mine, you stuck your tongue deep and passionately into my mouth. I melted, I cried with joy inside. It was euphoria.

We both had red-hot cheeks, and very watery eyes. A hot feeling of arousal and love and passion filled my entire body.... My throat felt like it was about to explode like a chimney releasing this bubbling feeling building up inside of me...

We walked to the kitchen (I can't remember why we left your room...?).

On the way there, you suddenly pushed me hard against the wall, and again stuck your tongue deep into my mouth, holding your lips tight against mine and kissed me with an even more intense passion and power than before. It is a moment I will never forget. I felt faint from your touch.

I left to go to another friends house, as had been planned earlier. I was floating.

You came on your skateboard to visit me there.

You arrived smelling.... like you.... the same smell you still have today...

We kissed shyly, "like friends" again... but, when you left, you hesitated.

The image of you, standing there, leaning forward onto your skateboard will forever be imprinted on my mind.

You winked at me... grinned, with one corner of your mouth raised higher than the other... I melted... I cried inside again. My knees caved beneath me as I watched you drop your board and skate off with the others...

I knew that, from that moment on, you would forever be My Valentine.

Love you lots gorgeous...xxx

Smiling

2010-02-13T10:29:00.000-08:00

Penny penetration

2010-02-13T10:23:00.000-08:00

Penny was sitting alone having a cigarette under the fairy-lit rain sheeting while her friends partied inside. She had had a long week and was enjoying the quiet time with her own thoughts. Slowly sipping in a refreshing taste of her G&T, and lifting her smoke back up to her lips, she sensed someone in the doorway behind her.

She turned her head slighty to see a man standing there, leaning inward, both hands cupped together against the doorframe as he stared directly at her. A little annoyed at first, Penny turned and took a drag of her smoke, frowning at the thought of the stranger nonchalantly watching her. She turned again, intrigued, and found him smiling, still watching her.

He moved forward, took the smoke from her fingertips, pulled in a deep, long drag, and blew the smoke just past her face, small wifts of the curling white air drifting passed her cheeks and blonde locks.

'Oh god", she thought to herself. "He's probably going to pull some cheesey line..."

But the stranger remained silent, smiling at her, leaning ever closer, enjoying the smoke he had so easiliy removed from her grasp.

She sipped her G&T and muttered, confused, "Do I, like, do I know you?"

"No", he spoke. "Not yet".

"God, there's the cheese", she laughed to herself.

"Ok. So do you make a habbit out of creeping chics out and taking their smokes?"

"Not usually", he breathed in another drag. "You're.... different", he smiled and exhaled.

Penny wasn't quite ready to return to the loudness of her friends, but this was also not quite what she'd had in mind. She decided to hold out a little longer and humour the stranger.

"Oh, really? How might I be different?"

"Well, you're exactly the kind of girl my wife likes me to bring home...." he answered smoothly.

Blushing and caught off guard, Penny stuttered for a come-back, but was lost for words.

The stranger stood composed and kept gazing at her, silently.

Eventually Penny broke "So, where is this lovely wife of yours?"

"She's there" he pointed toward a group of women sitting on a deck one level up. "The blonde".

It was dark and Penny could make out a blonde, but more than that she couldn't determine.

"Seems like she has plenty of women to take home tonight..." Penny tested.

"Yeah... she noticed YOU, though".

Just then the blonde emerged behind the stranger, first wrapping her arms around his waste and pecking him on the cheek, then swiftly moving past him toward to Penny.

Standing right in front of Penny, the woman cocked her hip inward, to be pressing right against Penny's own hip, and touched her fingers to the pointed v-neck of Penny's blouse. Slowly looking up into Penny's eyes, she smiled and said "You're nice..."

Caught completely off-guard, Penny was feeling incredibly attracted to the woman, who smelt of vanilla and wore her hair short and purposefully-messy. Penny could feel her nipples harden as the woman lingered with her hip still cocked inward, and her fingers still palying with the V of Penny's blouse.

Feeling herself blush, Penny responded "you're pretty ...nice... too".

The woman's husband was still standing in his spot in the doorway, watching this calmly. "Why don't we three find somewhere quiet to get to know each other?"

Penny shrugged, smiling, as if looking for more direction.

"Our place is just up the road... I promise, we're not serial killers or anything like that!" the woman reassured.

Penny hadn't gone home with a stranger in years, and had just met these two. She had been looking for more excitement in her life, though, and was feeling extremely aroused by this point, so she agreed.

The three strolled up the road to the couple's small duplex. They chatted about their careers, origins and such. The couple were walking arm-in-arm, but the woman reached out and stroked Penny's arm or neck frequently.

On their way, the woman nervously blurted out "oh my, we don't even know your name!" The three all laughed nervously and exhanged names -- the woman was Carol and the man was Ted.

Once inside, Ted poured all three a glass of sparkling wine, and they got seated in the courtyard. The couple had a jacuzzi, which was steaming. The blue-tinted garden lights made the water seem very inviting and it wasn't long before Carol stood up, slipped her dress down, dropped her lacey g-string and climbed in. Her breasts were small, but pert. She was a fit woman, very well toned, bordering on muscular.

"Come on in" she invited.

Penny didn't hesitate to lift off her top and unhook her bra, exposing her large breasts. She stood, unbuttoned her jeans and shifted them and her panties simultaneously down her curvy thighs, stepping out of them and gliding toward the steaming water, where Carol relaxed with her sparkling drink.

Once in the water, the two immediately started kissing. Carol pinned Penny against the Jacuzzi side and kissed her deeply and passionately. Penny felt her body warming in the Jacuzzi water, but also from the inside as her arousal grew.

Carol climbed on top of Penny, one leg on either side, and stood up, sliding her tight body slowly up Penny's until her shaven pussy was an inch from Penny's nose. Pausing only briefly, she slid her body back down and kissed Penny once again, all the while holding on to the edge of the Jacuzzi with both hands. Kicking one leg out and over, she sat on Penny's lap, sideways, and kissed her, her arms wrapped around Penny's neck, while Penny used her fingers to familiarise herself with the shapes and curves and dents of Carol's unusually hard torso.

Ted was still sitting at the garden table, slowly sipping his drink, and watching. Both woman could see the erection in his pants, which he made no effort to hide. But for now they took no notice of it, continuing to touch and tease and learn each other.

Penny's hand slid down Carol's stomache, and as she found her pussy and clit, began vigorously fingering the woman she had just met. Carol was tight, but moist, and encouraged Penny with groans as she lifted herself siglthly and started pumping on Penny's fingers once again using the Jacuzzi edge for balance and leverage.

"Oooh, this is soo fu-ucking goo-od... but, hurh, uuh, but lets uuh lets take this inside" Carol groaned.

Penny wasn't objecting and the two stood and moved inside, where Ted was laying down a family-size beach towel. Carol took Penny's hand and walked her to the towel, and slowly got down onto the floor, pulling Penny gently down with her, and kissing her deeply once again. She moved down Penny's front, stopping to lick her nipples, squeezing hard on Penny's much larger breasts.

Penny lay back as Carol moved further down, wasting no time starting to lick and suck on Penny's clit. She flicked her tongue fast and vigorous, and slowly slid two fingers into Penny's hot, engorged pussy. Moaning and stuttering out "mm, good... oh god, mm", Carol found Penny's g-spot and rubbed hard and fast while sucking on her clit.

Ted, now nude, came over and kneeled next to penny's head and slowly slid his body down to be lying next to her. He started caressing Penny's face and neck, and sucked gently on her breasts. He moved up to kiss her, pressing his hard cock against her thigh as he did so. All the while Carol continued to pump at Penny's slopping vagina, which was hot and burning with pleasure.

Carol moved to the opposite side of Penny from Ted and gently encouraged Penny to raise her hips, as Ted slid his hand under her, and found his wifes fingers. He teased Penny with short dips of his fingers into her pussy in unison with Carols, then quickly moving back out and circling her groin area, each time moving ever closer to her butt, which was slippery with mositure from Carol's loving.

Overwhelmed with pleasure, Penny could feel herself building closer to an orgasm. Her breasts ached with each of Teds nibbles, Carols pumping and sucking making her pussy feel fuller with each stroke, and her mind focused on Ted's fingers - their ever increasing proximity to her anus.

As Ted slid a finger gently into her ass, Penny cried "thats...it ... don't... stop!" and felt wave after wave as her vagina and anus pulsated with pleasure. Ted and Carol grinned at each other, proud of their team effort.

"We're not done with you yet, though, missy", Carol jived. She leaned back and opened a wooden box that stood under the near-by lounge coffee table. Inside where lubes and dildos and vibrators, anal beads, pieces of rope and cloth... Penny was intrigued by the collection!

Carol pulled out a strap-on and said, "How would you feel about wearing this? I... I love it when a woman fucks me".

Ted was kneeling to the side, slowy moving his hand up and down his long hard shaft. He grinned and gestured for Penny to "go ahead".

Penny had worn a strap on before, and had enjoyed it, so she didn't hesitate to reach for the harness, which held a large pink dildo in it. She fastened it around her waste, and jokingly jerked the dildo a few times. "This is going to be fun lady!" she laughed.

The two women were sitting on their haunches in front of one another. Reaching for Carol's pussy, Penny moved slower this time than she had in the Jacuzzi. She slid her fingers along the crease between Carol's firm thighs and shaven lips. Cirlcling closer, she found Carol's warm hole and slid a finger in, rubbing in circular motions on Carols clit. With her other hand, Penny fondled her own breasts and tugged gently on her nipples. Bothed moaned in enjoyment, and smiled and giggled at each other as they looked straight into one anothers eyes.

Carol lifted herself and turned, reversing onto Penny's lap. She slowly slid herself down onto the dildo, moaning as she did so. Feeling the weight and pressure on the dildo pressing against her own pubic bone and top of her clit, Penny allowed Carol to control the movement, using her strong legs to lift herself up and down on Penny's new cock.

Reaching around, Penny twisted Carol's nipples in her fingers and nibbled on her neck and earlobe. Tiny droplets of sweat moved down Carol's back, forming small rivers down her spine and disappearing into her neat, slim crack.

Penny felt Ted arrive behind her, kneeling and leaning foward to whisper "she's going to want you to stick it in her ass".

He handed Carol a small vibrator which she touched gently to her own clit, still thrusting up and down on Penny's cock.

Penny grabbed the anal beads and slowly shifted them into Carols beautifully pinched anus. They went in with ease and Carol lifted herself up so that Penny now knelt and fucked Carol "doggy-style", with easy access to, and view of, Carol's ass. Ted slid himself down behind Penny and started licking her clit, his licks getting longer with each stroke until he was flicking his toungue just past her own anus on each movement.

Penny now had most the beads in Carol's ass, which was so firm it hardly bounced on each hard thrust backward of Carols, as she fought to take in Penny's pink extension.

Penny pulled lightly on the beads, as Carol blurted "oh fuck yeah, play with my ass!"

Ted chuckled but continued to lick Penny from underneath her. He slowly slid a finger into Penny's now very well lubricated asshole. Penny felt light headed as she felt her ass tingle around his finger.

Carol stopped pumping up and down and, letting her still-vibrating bullet drop to the floor, reached round with both hands, to pull on her but cheeks and lower herself slowly onto the dildo. Penny helped guide it and watched closely as Carol took the cock in, inch by inch, until it was 3/4 of the way in, when she paused and picked up her vibrator once again.

Carol used her bellet against her clit while she pumped very slowly up and down on the strap-on dildo. Ted raised himseld up and poked his dripping wet penis gently at Penny's loosened asshole. As he did this, he rubbed her clit from unerneath, cupping her sopping wet vagina and being careful to move down on each downward thrust of his wife's, so that Penny could feel the pressure of those pumps against her clit.

Ted entered Penny's asshole slowly, gliding and stopping, then moving deeper in. Penny was burning with pleasure and pumped faster into Carol's ass now, still watching with enjoyment the glistening beads of sweat slithering down Carol's toned back. She could feel Carol's deep belly breathing, and pumped harder with each thrust of Ted's cock into her own backside, his balls slapping her vagina on each vigorous movement.

Her clit was being knocked and ground, her vagina slapped and her asshole stretched full with Ted's large dick, and she knew she would come again soon. Carol was writhing and breathing loudly, moaning and swinging her body to meet each of Penny's thursts, all the while rapidly rubbing the vibrator against her clit.

"Its...I'm.... oh fuck yeah!! Oh..............gggggggggggggggggggggggggggggd" Carol screamed as she came, Penny sticking a finger deep into Carols pumping vagina and feeling the muscles spasm around her finger and cock.

As she did this, Ted did exactly the same and pumped hard against Penny's g-spot, her vagina and anus full with Ted. She felt herself burning and immediately started gushing, her luscious moisture dripping down her thighs and mixing with Carol's own juices as Carol pumped down onto her for the final few thrusts.

As Penny finished coming, Ted rammed himself deep into her, his balls hitting her vagina as his abdomen met her bum cheeks. She could feel him coming, his stomache and penis pulsing in rhythmic waves.

Carol had lifted herself off the dildo and collapsed forward, breathing heavily. As Ted finished and pulled out of Penny, she let herself crumble forward, and rested her head on the back of Carol's shoulder. "Nice..." she laughed.

Ted stayed kneeling for a while, completely breathless, hands on his hips, leaving shining wet marks on his smooth tanned skin.

After a couple of moments he stood, grabbed the champagne and said "lets go cool down in the Jacuzzi, ladies".

Pam and Don meet Rob and Mary

2010-02-11T04:16:00.000-08:00

Pam and Don had just moved to a new town. The area they lived in could be described as suburban, but was very close to the main city centre, where there was a vibrant night life and loads of good restaurants. They'd purchased a cute home, with a garden that had a deck and jacuzzi in it, and a cosy lounge with a fire place. Now all they needed were some friends to help fill the space!

On her way home from work in their second week of being in town, Pam noticed a very attractive man on the train. She glanced at him numerous times, but was conscious not to stare. It seemed like he had noticed her too, but she could not be sure. When he got up to leave at the same station as her, her heart skipped a beat with nervous excitement.

They were both walking in the same direction from the station. He was tall and slim, and wore black suit-pants made of an elegant, thin fabric and a black buttoned-up shirt. He carried nothing, and walked casually with his hands in his pockets, exposing the tightness of his butt.

Pam couldn't quite walk fast enough to get ahead of him, and didn't really want to slow down so that he could get ahead, so they walked adjacent to each other, in silence for about 200m. Pam was feeling very nervous. Don and her had been excited about the move, but missed their friends and were anxious to start meeting new people. Here was a young, attractive man who seemedly lived in the same neighbourhood, and Pam couldn't think of a single way to initiate conversation.

Eventually, she blurted out "You live around here?"

The stranger, jumped a little - startled by her interruption of their mutual silence. He then looked at her and said "uh, yeah, just up here", as he pointed to a small complex of houses just up the road.

"Oh, ok", she responded. "We've just moved to a cottage in Glenlilly Terrace, a little further up... we're still settling in".

"Welcome!", smiled the stranger. "I'm Rob".

"Hi, Rob. I'm Pam. You catch the train every day?" she asked.

"Yeah, mostly. Somedays I use my bike if I know I've got lots of errands to run during the day. The train's pretty safe and fast", Rob replied.

"Cool, I'll be catching the train most days too, I think. I'm working in town, my husband is working from home for the time-being, until he can find an office to rent somewhere near-by. Um, look. Um, I know we've just met and you might think I'm a little crazy, but we're new to town, we don't know anybody... any chance you'd like to join us for a drink later? You could come to ours, or we could try somewhere that you recommend?"

Rob seemed hesitant, but eventually suggested "Er..yeah, ok, that could be good - my girlfriend and I usually have cocktails at BananaRama - have you seen it? Its in Bird Street? I'll suggest it to her, maybe we will see you there later, they have happy hour just now from 6-7pm".

"Ok great, I'll go get Don and we'll look out for you! Thanks for the suggestion, we have seen 'BananaRama' but haven't tried many local places yet!", Pam could hardly stifle her girlish giggle at the name "BananaRama".

Rob smiled as he moved to cross the road towards the complex he had indicated earlier. "See you in a bit, Pam".

---

As Don opened up to let Pam in, she was pressed against the front gate, ready to press her lips against his at the soonest chance. "Mmmmmmmmmmm", she breathed and, as she pulled away for him to open the gate properly, "you're nice".

Smiling, she told him about Rob, the man who lives just down the road and catches the train, and the plan they had made to get some cocktails. Don was itching to get out of the house and suggested they head up there right away, they could have a cocktail or two first and maybe order some snacks.

This is exactly what they did, and when half way through their second cocktail each Don noticed Pam sit upright and pear toward a couple making their way through the restaurant to the outside area where they were sitting.

"Thats him!", she exclaimed, Don recognising the excitement as attraction and smiling knowingly at his wife.

"ooh, nice!" he whispered as they approached.

Rob's girlfriend was also an attractive person - she wore a lose white dress pulled tight around her waste with a dark brown woven belt, exposing slim, tanned legs. Her hair was dark blonde and worn down, with green dangling earings bringing attention to her petite face.

The two sat down rather awkwardly, and Don stuck out his hand "Hi, I'm Don"

Rob shook Don's hand, "Rob. This is Mary".

"Hi", Mary smiled shyly.

Pam greeted them both with a wide grin and gestured to the waiter to come over "get yourselves some cocktails - we came early and are on our seconds now!".

----

The first evening with Mary and Rob passed easily, with lots of small-talk about jobs and backgrounds, and lots of Q&A about the area, good places to eat and shop, go for hikes and so on. The couples had a lot in common and conversation flowed freely, something which both couples seemed relieved about.

At the end of the evening, the couples agreed to meet over the weekend for a lazy afternoon at Rob and Mary's. They would invite some other friends for Don and Pam to meet.

That night, Pam and Don snuggled in bed and mused over the evening past. They both agreed that Rob and Mary were a great couple, but were nervous of coming off as too keen.

** To be continued -- this story aims to establish some setting / background for a new series of stories I have in mind **

Women in Gonzo Porn

2010-02-09T08:59:00.000-08:00

This article, by a porn producer, talks about the difference he encountered moving from hetero to gay porn -- the first was filled with hatred, anger and violence (toward / against women), the latter was filled with fun, equality and sensuality.

I know that gonzo porn is very popular, but its just not my thing -- I don't find images of women being beaten, choked, waterboarded, crying etc during sex arousing. I don't mind that other people do and I don't mind if consenting people re-enact these types of scenes for their own pleasure. I've seen some BDSM stuff where the "sub" seems to be in a meditative state of sorts, and does seem to enjoy the "punishment" s/he is receiving... in common online porn, however, it seldom looks/feels this way. Call me prudish, it doesn't sit right that severe degradation of women has become so mainstream - it can hardly be called a fetish anymore - I have not seen many porn clips lately that don't involve basically this sequence: violent facefucking, anal, numerous slaps, choking with mascara running down her face, facial cumshot. Take any one of those acts individually and I'm not worried - I enjoy a good facial, some slapping and/or anal, but because it feels good, not because in the process I'm being degraded... its a subtle difference, hard to explain, and maybe I am completely off the mark?

It is when this trend gets combined with a seemingly very popular (based on countless postings/comments on r/sex) view that women are a-sexual / less sexual than men / repressed etc. When coupled with this view, sex becomes only about what the man can get from the women, who is assumed to not get, or desire, any enjoyment from sex.

This fits into the broader issue of societies views of sex -- sex scandal after sex scandal, yet society still thinks sex is "taboo", not appropriate for "the movies", should always be monogamous, and usually would be initiated by a man pursuing a resistant female.

We need to start seeing that men and women are sexual beings...

(the gonzo porn will stay, no doubt... and thats fine, as long as the people getting off to it realise that the women should be not only be consenting, but also deriving some pleasure from the act)

EDIT: Seems I'm not the only one. Not sure I'd necessarily say its gonzo vs. intimate, I think there is a continuum... and probably many others that cut through and across that in every direction/dimension.

Something to muse over

2010-02-08T10:21:00.000-08:00

"I regret loosing myself to make me more of what you wanted"

2010-02-08T05:20:00.000-08:00

A regret found here... have we not all done this to some extent? On a broad level, we sacrifice tiny pieces of ourselves everyday just to fit society's molds - to meet the expected norm.

I think in many relationships this occurs, too.

Sexually, its happening all of the time -- men and women "do it missionary style", and then sneak of to their PCs for some porn / visit a sex worker etc. And get horribly upset with each other when they discover the use of porn / sex workers etc

I think it should be part of marriage (or anti-marriage or whatever) vows that partners are meant to enhance each other, support each other, help make each other the best version of themselves they can possibly be. And that means the best version of that crossdresser-whos-into-ponyplay as one could possibly be.

Lets add that to ours, H -(though I think that commitment has always been there, unvoiced)

xx

Lazy Morningz

2010-02-06T01:56:00.000-08:00

Spent the morning lazing in bed... watching rather cheesey porn, chatting to some friendly znighters and indulging..

This pic I have seen before, it came up again today on funtasticus.... I love the ass-squeeze!

Also found this one particularly hot...

And am putting this here as a reminder... I saw a model in this range at Whet Emporium recently... really want one... its officially on my "wish list" ;-P

mmm... who knows what the rest of the day might bring... :-)